Hell of a Life
by Ms Marvel Dixon
Summary: Part three of the Clara/Two Worlds series. With a kid, a teenager, and normal people problems can two ex-hunters make sense of their white picket fence life? It has proven to be difficult and there are sure to be bumps in the road but with Clara and Dean together and finally happy, maybe things will stay normal. Doubtful.
1. Chapter 1

The loud shriek of a terrified little girl filled the house. Her parents rushed to her upon instinct carrying holy water and a shotgun filled with rock salt. The whole house got quiet once they opened her door. She had her blankets pulled over her head and they could see her shaking.

"Gwen?" Her father walked over to her side and knelt beside the small bed. She didn't answer him. "Gwen what's wrong?" he asked in a stern voice.

"Daddy?" She questioned not really sure who had come to her rescue.

"Yea, it's me sweetheart." He lightened his tone.

The little girl threw her blankets away and jumped into his arms. He nearly fell over at the sheer force of her jump. "Daddy make him stop!" She cried, tears streaming down her face.

"Make what stop?" Her mother walk into the room and sat on the bed.

"The voice... it keeps whispering and waking me up." She sniffed as her father picked her up and sat on the bed with her in his lap.

"What is the voice saying?" Her mother asked a bit worried about the poor girl who was so afraid.

The little girl rubbed her eyes and looked up at her parents. They smiled down at her and she felt her fer melt away quickly. "He keeps saying names." She took a deep breath.

"He?" Her father asked looking over at his wife who was just as confused. "Dose _he_ have a name?"

"C...Castel...Casiel..." She stuttered not really knowing how to pronounce his name.

Both parents let out a very relieved sigh. They shook their heads and looked down at their daughter. "Castiel?" He mother asked and the girl's eyes went wide. They both laughed and her father laid her back down. "Alright Gwen listen to me okay?" Her mother said in a soft voice. "Castiel will never harm you I promise." She smiled. "Just try to ignore him...okay?"

"But he's loud... he scares me." She sniffed clutching her stuff bear that her father had placed next to her.

"Yes Castiel is very loud, but you shouldn't be afraid." Her mother said. "Next time he wakes you up... yell at him. Say Castiel I am trying to sleep." She huffed and Gwen let out a little laugh. "Go ahead... yell at him." She nudged her daughter.

"I'm trying to sleep!" Her little voice was as shaky but she still smiled.

"See..." She paused. "He's gone now."

"Okay." The little girl rubbed her eyes and yawned.

She quickly fell asleep under the watchful eye of her parents. Once she was asleep they snuck out of her room and closed the door. They both looked at each other with a sigh. "We really have to do something about Cas's timing." He huffed as they both made their way back to their bedroom.

"Hey he's your guardian angel... you talk to him." She laughed with a yawn trying not to rub her tired eyes.

Once the couple lay back down in their bed, placing their weapons back under the frame they faced each other and smiled. "Good night Clara." He smiled placing a soft kiss on her lips.

She hummed in ease and sighed closing her eyes. "Goodnight Dean."


	2. Chapter 2

Three years, eleven months, and fourteen days. One wedding, a baby, and a teenager about to graduate.

That was their life and if it wasn't the best three years, eleven months, and fourteen days of either of their lives they would be lying. It was hard at first, being that normal came to Dean as a shock. He had no idea how to hold down a job for so long, he had no idea how to be a husband, and the hardest of all... he had no idea how to be a father. His own father wasn't even a good father figure. How was he supposed to help Clara raise a little baby.

Too many sleepless nights to count, and nine really long months led to the day Dean and Clara thought would never happen. They thought Hell would have frozen over before they had a kid. More than once did they almost called it quits but for some reason neither of them wanted to let go of what they had worked so hard to finally get. So through all the fights, the six hours of labour and the countless diaper changes, Clara and Dean managed to stick it out.

Nothing about parenthood had hit either of them until the night Clara and Penelope were in her office. Hotch had made it painstakingly clear that Clara was not to step foot out of the building during cases. She was not allowed to go into the field with them so she stayed behind with Penelope. She loved Penelope but sitting behind all those screens everyday bored her.

She had been sitting in a chair staring at her hands for an hour. Penelope was typing away while Clara was distracted. "What is so fascinating about your hands?" Penelope laughed when she noticed what her friend was doing. Clara was about two weeks from her due date and even though she had been prepared for a kid no one really thought Clara realized what exactly being a mom was all about.

"They are so chubby." Clara huffed as she looked at her hands and then tried to look at her feet but couldn't. "When did I get so fat." She huffed giving up hope of ever seeing her feet again.

"Bitch you are not fat." Penelope snapped with a laugh. "You just have another human growing inside of you." She pointed out.

"Yeah you can come out any day now!" Clara yelled at her stomach.

"Tired?" Penelope asked and got a glare of Clara.

"Are you kidding I am always tired! I can't even walk up a flight of stairs without losing my breath." Clara sight leaning back in the chair a bit. "I mean I used to chase after werewolves and gun down shapeshifters." Clara closed her eyes.

"You haven't done any of that in a long time." Penelope pointed out.

"Yes thank you for reminding me." Clara huffed in annoyance. Another thing that seemed to pop up out of nowhere; her hormones. "I am well aware of the fact I am now just a boring house wife." Clara said feeling tears in her eyes. She hadn't cried so much in her life but these last nine months had been hell on her emotions, Dean's too.

"You're not boring!" Penelope laughed. "You will be a house wife but you're not boring." She laughed as she avoided Clara's failed attempted to hit her.

"I swear if I start knitting and baking pies... would you be a dear and put me out my misery?" Clara asked with big sad eyes.

"What just cause you're having a kid you have to be 90?" Penelope laughed as she turned to face her friend. "You're gonna be fine. It's only a year off."

"What the hell am I supposed to do for a year?" Clara whined.

"Uh I don't know how about keep he/she alive." Penelope pointed to Clara's stomach. "I still can't believe you don't want to know the sex." Penelope shook her head.

"Well that's the only thing keeping this interesting." Clara smirked. "Dean bets it's a boy, and I bet it's a girl."

"A bet? What do you get if you win?"

"Well if I win I get to punch Dean in the face and if he wins he gets a son." Clara smiled.

"Why do you wanna punch Dean in the face!" Penelope giggled.

"Well one I am fat because of him, and two I just really want punch his stupid face." Clara smiled. Both of them laughed for a second before Penelope got a call from the team.

"How is everything?" Derek's voice came through the speaker first.

"Well depends who you are asking." Clara spoke up with a laugh. "Penelope is hungry and I'm just tired."

"Sounds about right." JJ laughed and so did Penelope. "We are just headed to the airport now, be back in the morning."

"Have a safe-" Clara was cut off by pain pulsing through her body. Penelope looked toward her quickly noticing how she had suddenly sat up and her face looked pale. "That did not feel good." Clara barley whispered.

"Is everything okay?" Spencer's panicked voice came out of no where.

"Well you tell me doctor." Clara mocked him. "I- oh my god." She tried to sit back but sat forward in pain again. "Holy hell." Clara whispered in pure pain again. Out off all the torturing and pain she as been though in her life she had to say this is one of the worst pains anyone could ever feel. "I think I need a doctor." Clara said looking down at her pants that had suddenly felt very warm.

"Oh my!" Penelope jumped up at the sight of Clara's pants. It looked like her water had broken but something was wrong, there was some blood. "Yes you do."

Nine and a half hours, two yelling nurses, one really tense doctor, and one really terrified husband later a little bundle was handed to Clara, her eyes barely able to stay awake long enough to see the colour of the blanket. "Ha!" She laughed as Dean was handed the baby first. "I win." She smiled and quickly slipped into unconsciousness.

A few tests and an extra day at the hospital only made Clara worry even more. If she couldn't even keep the baby safe while she was inside how could she do that when she was exposed! Dean had sat by her and ensured her countless times that everything was going to be okay but it didn't work until she finally go to hold the baby.

Dean had just finished showing her off to their friends when Clara woke up from another nap and was sitting alone in her hospital room. She could hear the baby crying quietly from outside and her heart ached a bit. Dean walked in shortly after and Clara sat up straight ad tucked her hair behind her ears.

"Well I guess it's time you get to see your mommy right?" Dean asked in a hushed tone as he walked slowly and carefully over to Clara.

Dean smiled at Clara and she held out her arms to hold the bundle being handed to her. Dean placed the girl in Clara's arms and Clara quickly pulled her in closely. Clara could feel her heart melting as the little girl's face scrunched form the sudden lack of muscle around her body. Dean's arms were apparently much more comfortable. She started to cry a but and when Dean looked at Clara he noticed she was actually crying to.

"Why are you crying?" Dean asked quickly sitting next to her and putting an arm around her shoulders. She put her head on his shoulder and shook her head with a shaky sigh.

"She is so tiny." She choked out as she slowly rocked the baby back to sleep. A small smile came to both their faces in the four seconds of silence.

"Mr. and Mrs Winchester?" A loud voice came from the door and they both looked up. Even through they had been married for 6 months it still sounded odd to be called Mrs. Winchester. A doctor walked in with a file. "All the tests are looking good and it seems this one is a fighter."

"That's not a surprise." Dean said under his breath which made Clara smile.

"There is only one problem." The doctor half sighed and half smiled.

"What?" They both panicked right away.

"She doesn't have a name yet." He said handing them a birth certificate with an empty line for them to fill out.

"Holy crap." Dean exhaled quickly when the doctor left. "What the hell." He swore shaking his head trying to calm his nerves.

"Alright calm down." Clara laughed. "Daddy's bit of a drama queen." She whispered to the baby who moved in response.

"So name?" Dean asked and Clara couldn't think of a name.

They both stared at the little bundle in her arms for about ten minutes. "We could name her Mary." She smiled over at Dean.

"She doesn't look like a Mary though." He pointed out. "Danny?" He asked and Clara laughed. "What that's a girl's name to." He argued. Clara shook her head and sighed. "Okay..." Dean paused as they both looked at the little girl whose eyes could barely open. "I was watching T.V last week and there was this girl... her name was Gwen." Dean pointed out.

"Gwen?" Clara asked as she looked over at Dean who shrugged. "Wait..." Clara paused at the name. "The only T.V you ever watch other than the news is Doctor Sexy." She narrowed her eyes. "Please tell me you don't want to name our daughter after a character in a soap opera." Clara whined a bit as the baby squirmed in her arms.

"Well in my defence and the shows... Nurse Gwen is the smartest." He shrugged. "Plus I think she likes it." Dean said as he slowly pointed over at the baby who seemed to have smirked a bit.

"She is gonna be a dramatic one isn't she?" Clara sighed as she placed a kiss on the baby's head. "Gwen Winchester..." Clara actually smiled. "I like that." She whispered.


	3. Chapter 3

_Three months pregnant and very nervous. That's how Clara describes her wedding day. She never thought in a million years she would ever see this day but there she was, standing in a hotel room with a white dress and a small banquette of roses._

_The ceremony was going to be staring within the next hour and she was left alone just to collect her thoughts. She sighed deeply at her appearance. She had gained some weight and it was obvious in the dress. She ran a hand over her swollen stomach but smiled anyway. _

_"You are going to have one hell of a family little one." She laughed. _

_"You can say that again." A voice came from the door and Clara froze. She couldn't move. She knew that voice, she had since she was 16. But that voice should not be behind her. She looked up in the mirror slowly. _

_Her breath escaped her once she saw him. He had grown out his hair and somehow gotten his shoulders to grow out. He gave her a weak smile and she quickly turned to face him. "Sam?" She questioned as her breath hitched. _

_"Hi." He smiled at her and took a step forward._

_"No..." She shook her head and stepped back. "You... can't be real." She said shaking her head again and again. _

_"Well I am." He sighed. "I can't stay long." he huffed. _

_"What?" She questioned. _

_"Look I just came to make sure Dean followed through with his promise and that he isn't still trying to find me."_

_"Find you?" Clara laughed raising her eyebrows. "You're dead." She corrected him._

_"That's right. I am... so no one can know about this little visit." Sam answered quickly rolling his eyes. _

_"You're alive?" She questioned. _

_"Yes... but not to you or Dean." He sighed again. _

_"But... you're alive!" She nearly yelled. _

_"Keep you're voice down." Sam rushed and closed the door quietly. _

_"Keep my voice down?" She laughed at him again. "How can I when you are freaking alive!" She raised her voice again. "You've been dead for the better part of a year and now you're alive? What the hell!" She yelled again._

_"Hey." Sam took three long strides to her and grabbed her arm. He shoved a hand over her mouth and held a tight grip."I said. Keep. Your. Voice. Down." He ordered as he stared down at her very seriously. _

_Clara jumped at Sam's tight grip but couldn't shake out of it. She pushed away but he held her arm tightly. She was going to bite his hand but he removed it when he noticed her confusion. _

_"No one can know about this." He said. "Dean needs to stay with you... here... not with me out there." Sam said._

_"How long have you been topside?" Clara asked quickly realizing that Sam wasn't exactly Sam. _

_"Better part of a year." He nodded letting her arm go finally._

_"What?" She whispered so she wouldn't yell. _

_"Dean wanted to be normal...so when I jumped he got his wish." Sam explained quickly. "Plus apparently I am better hunter on my own." he smiled proudly. _

_"You can't be serious." She said stepping away from him. "You've been alive this whole time and you've been hunting... And at what point were you going to tell your brother?" She huffed crossing her arms. _

_"Never." Sam answered and she knew he was being honest. "The only way he was going to get what he wanted was by me dying. So I died. And that's the way it's gonna stay." Sam stepped closer._

_"Then why are you here?" She asked as he stared at her. _

_"Come on... can't a guy see his brother get married?" Sam laughed. "Plus you have some really hot friends... I didn't know the BAU or the FBI was so stacked." he winked. _

_"Who are you?" Clara shook her head._

_"New and improved..." He shrugged. "Now I gotta go..." Sam said turning his back._

_"Wait..." She called out after him and when he didn't stop she went after him._

_"Clara." Sam shook his head as he turned at the door. "I told you, this is how it has to be." He said closing the door behind him._


	4. Chapter 4

Clara sat up with a gasp. The bed sheets were wrapped around her feet and she had a layer of sweat covering her. She was breathing deeply and she suddenly felt Dean sit up.

"What? What is it?" he asked quickly, his eyes not opened completely.

"Nothing." Clara answered quickly. She was reliving the moments before their wedding but she couldn't tell him. "Just a dream, I guess." She sighed and Dean rubbed his eyes and looked at her. "Sorry for waking you." She smiled over once he placed a kiss on her shoulder to let her know everything was going to be alright.

"It's fine... not like I was sleeping." He laughed and she shook her head. "Now go back to sleep... we have a very early and long day tomorrow." Dean sighed as he laid back down punching the pillow a few times. Clara sighed deeply as she lay back slowly staring at the ceiling. It was quiet for a second before Dean noticed. "You know sleeping usually works best if you close your eyes." He said opening one eye to see the look on her face. "Clara?" he questioned and she looked down at him with a small smile.

"Yea?" She asked finally settling into a comfortable place.

"You alright?" he asked reaching out for her hand.

"I thought we were past the days where we would ask that question." She laughed with a deep sigh.

"And I thought we were past the days where I needed to ask." Dean answered quickly.

"Just a stupid dream Dean, let it go." She rolled her eyes at him and he huffed at her answer.

"A dream that has been waking you for almost two years... and yet you still won't tell me what it is." Dean sighed taking his hand back from hers.

"It's not something worth talking about." She huffed back.

"Fine..." Dean ended the conversation and turned his back on her.

"Oh what? You're mad at me now?" She huffed with a laugh and when Dean didn't answer she knew he was tired of her lying. Hell, she was tired of lying. "Dean?" She questioned and he didn't move. "Seriously?" She asked annoyed.

Nothing more was said between the two. Clara groaned as she turned to the other side. She fell asleep soon but she felt guilty. She wanted to tell him what her dream was about but she couldn't. She couldn't bring all that up now, things had been going so good for almost four years now that if she told him he would never forgive her.

* * *

The sun rose quickly the next day and Clara was last to get up. Dean was in the shower when she opened her eyes. She rolled off the bed and walked into the hallway. It was quiet and she wondered why. She walked by Gwen's room and panicked a bit at the silence.

"Gwen? You awake yet sweetheart?" She asked as she opened the door slowly.

"Yes." Her little voice came from the corner of the room.

When Clara walked in she couldn't see Gwen. "Where are you?" She asked with a laugh.

"Over here." She answered calmly.

Clara followed the voice to the other side of her bed. Gwen was sitting the corner staring at ground. "What are you doing?" Clara asked walking over and sitting in front of her.

"Waiting." She answered not even looking up at her mother.

"For what?" Clara had to keep asking questions.

"Castiel." She sighed deeply. "He said he was going to bring me something but he hasn't come yet." She sighed a bit disappointed.

"Gwen, Castiel hasn't been around for a long time." Clara rolled her eyes. Cas hadn't even come to see her or Dean since Adrian was taken by Crowley. But apparently he made weekly visits to her daughter and Clara didn't know whether to be concerned or happy.

"He's coming." She argued.

"Okay... well how about we go eat breakfast and then you can come back and wait?" Clara offered.

"Okay." Gwen finally looked up with a big smile. She jumped forward into Clara's arm and they both laughed. Clara let her climb onto her back and she gave her a piggy back down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Adrian you better get your ass in gear!" She called out as they passed his closed bedroom door.

"Yea!" Gwen giggled loudly.

"Alright, do we want cereal or toast?" Clara asked Gwen as she placed her in a chair.

"Lucky Charms!" Gwen yelled and smacked the table a few times.

"Yea cause you need more energy." Clara whispered herself as she got the box out of the cupboard. When she opened the door and noticed there wasn't a box sitting on the self. "What the hell?" She whispered again.

"Lucky Charms!" Gwen shrieked loudly. She was hungry and if Clara didn't get her those colourful marshmallows she would have one really pissed of three-year old.

"Hold on sweetheart." Clara tried to say calmly. Clara looked in a few other cupboards and she couldn't find the stupid red box. "Really?" She sighed. Then her answer came jumping down the steps.

"Oh yea I ate the last of those last night." Adrian's voice made Clara turn around with a huff.

"What?" Both Clara and Gwen asked. Clara was more angry, and Gwen was hurt.

"What? I was hungry." He shrugged and rolled his eyes.

"So out of all the food in the fridge you choose the one things she eats?" Clara crossed her arms and watched as Adrian walked into the kitchen and grabbed an apple from the fridge.

"Well why does she get to eat them all." He whined.

"Oh my god, grow up." She rolled her eyes.

"Wow." Adrian huffed and rolled his eyes. "Nice."

"Just as nice as you eating your three-year old sister's cereal." Clara huffed.

"That's okay mommy... I can have toast." Gwen spoke up with a sigh.

"See she can have toast." Adrian said with his mouth full.

Clara shot him an annoyed look as she loaded the toaster with bread. Adrian huffed and rolled his eyes. For someone who was about to graduate high school, he was very moody. Then again it seemed to be a common thing with most 18 year olds... to me annoyed with their parents and just want out. But Adrian was worse. He had been distant, moody, and reckless the last year.

He would sneak out in the middle of the night, and disappear until the morning. He would skip school and come home late without an explanation. Clara and Dean have asked him hundreds of times where he would go and who he was hanging out with but he would get angry, yell, storm to his room and wouldn't come out until the sun came back up.

Clara and Dean had tried their best to try and discipline him but he would just run away. Something was bothering him but he wouldn't share. Clara didn't know what to do. She didn't have the parenting skills to deal with his attitude, and she didn't feel right lecturing him or yelling at him because he wasn't his mother. Something he reminded her of everyday. "You aren't my mother!" Were like little daggers in her heart every time he said those four words.

Clara sighed as the bread finally popped up. "Peanut butter or jam?" Clara asked Gwen.

"Um..." She hummed.

"Not that hard of a question." Adrian rolled his eyes.

"I...I.. Both?" Gwen stuttered as Adrian huffed at her.

"Alright." Clara smiled at Gwen and passed her the small plate with her toast. "Here you go." She smiled.

"Thank you." Gwen sighed sadly but smiled anyway.

Clara shook her head at Adrian who finished his apple and threw it into the sink. "Really? What are you an animal?" She asked and Adrian huffed putting the core in the garbage.

"There! Happy..." He rolled his eyes.

"You know you should really get a new reaction... because rolling your eyes at everything is just annoying." Clara shrugged.

"Oh yea..." he laughed. "Look who's talking."

"Don't you have class to skip?" Clara looked up quickly.

"Yes." He smiled proudly. She knew he wasn't bothered by her jab.

"Why don't you go to class? You might actually learn something other than smart come backs." Dean's annoyed voice came into the kitchen.

"Says the hunter who didn't finish high school." Adrian said under his breath.

"And look how that turned out for me." Dean fired back.

"Easy." Clara warned.

"No, I've had enough of your attitude toward school." Dean said looking over at Adrian and ignoring Clara. "If you don't want to go to school that's fine but you better be ready for a pretty shitty life kid. No education equals no job."

"Language." Clara barked as they all looked over at Gwen who just smiled up at them cheerfully with peanut butter on her face.

"No you're right Dean." Adrian laughed as he walked over to Dean. "I should go to school... because I might end up like you... with an annoying kid and a _naggy_ wife!" Adrian yelled finally getting angry.

"Get out." Dean ordered with is fists balled at his side and his face as cold as it could be. Adrian huffed and rolled his eyes and left quickly.

"And who knows if he'll come back this time." Clara sighed as she took Gwen's empty plate and put it in the sink. "Go wash your face, brush those teeth, and get dressed." Clara smiled down at Gwen.

"Okay!" She said and took off.

"What do you expect me to do?" Dean huffed getting back to the topic.

"Nothing." Clara shrugged as she leaned against the counter. "We can't do anything... we both know damn well you have to make mistakes before you can actually learn." She sighed.

"And that's what you want him to go through? You want him to screw up so he can learn?" Dean asked a bit confused.

"If that's what it takes." She sighed rubbing her face.

"Seriously?" Dean asked with a huff.

"Well what else do you suggest we do Dean?" She snapped a bit. "We aren't his parents, and he is 18. He is free to do whatever he wants and he knows it." Clara sighed.

Dean watched as she walked by him. He knew she had given up on Adrian because every time he told her she wasn't his mother it broke her heart. Dean understood that one person could only take so much and even though Clara was the strongest person he had ever met, he knew she was tired.

"We got a case... I'll drop Gwen off at daycare. Pick her up after work and I'll be back in a couple days." Clara said quietly.

"What about Adrian?" Dean asked.

"Just wait." She shrugged and finally made her way up the stairs.

Dean stood alone in the kitchen for a second. At first he was trying to think of a way to get Adrian to see his mistakes but then he suddenly realized what his life had turned into. It had all changed so quickly that he never really had a chance to think about it until it hit him. On his way to work his mind was racing.

It had been almost four years since he'd touch a gun, and it had been longer since he had even spoken about anything supernatural. He and Clara had turned into a normal, suburban couple, with actual problems. It seemed like a cliché when he thought about it. A rebellious teenager, a little girl who was the best accident of his life, and a wife who was slowly pulling way from him. 18-year-old Dean Winchester would never believe it.

* * *

"Alright what we got?" Clara was last to walk into the conference room.

"Where have you been? You're like fifteen minutes late." Morgan pointed out.

"Yes thank you, I have a watch." Clara rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry... Gwen didn't understand me when I said hurry up the first three times." She sighed sitting down looking at the tablet in front of her. It was quiet for a second as everyone stared at Clara. "Are we gonna keep staring or are we going to catch a killer?" She huffed and Penelope finally snapped into her brief.

"Right." She started. "Three days ago Atlanta P.D got a letter." She sighed. "And then they found this the next day." She sighed looking down quickly.

_"I took her. What are you going to do about it?"_ The letter was written in slanted and very messy cursive. It was a clear taunt to the police. When they all looked up at the screen they realized why Penelope wasn't exactly chipper to present them a new case.

"Jesus." JJ was first to express what everyone was thinking. The crime scene was by the side of a road and the pavement was no longer grey, not it was stained dark red. Someone had taken their time and dismembered a little girl.

"Becky Jenkins. She was 10." Garcia sighed not being able to look up at her friends or the screen. "She was taken from a local park in Atlanta. She was with some friends and when she didn't come home her mother called the police. They got that letter an hour after she was reported missing." Garcia said sitting down her back facing the screen.

"Talk about over kill." Clara spoke up and they all looked at her. "What we were all thinking it." She sighed. She knew she should feel something, guilt, pain, or anger at the sight of Becky but she felt nothing. She could tell everyone was going to take this case very seriously and it was going to be a tense few days. "Is she the only victim?" Clara asked slowly a bit afraid of the answer.

"No..." Garcia sighed and clicked the next button.

A few gasps from JJ and sighs from everyone else was what came with the next picture. Somehow the next body was even more mutilated and this time the Unsub took her head.

"Jamie Gunderson, 10 as well." Garcia huffed.

"We need to get to Atlanta." Hotch stood up quickly. "Plane leaves in ten." He said quickly.

"Oh and one more thing..." Garcia said before anyone could leave. "He has another girl. They just got a letter an hour ago." She sighed. "Alicia Jones."

"Garcia I want every child offender, sex offender, violent persons, with in teeny miles of every one of those girl's homes and background on everyone in the neighbourhood.

"Yes sir. Be careful." She nodded and quickly turned to leave for her office.

* * *

Everyone had their usual assignments. Talk to the victim's family and friends, search the crime scene for anything the local police could have missed, and starting on victimology. They all separated and got their jobs done.

Each girl was quiet, not many friends, but still very kind to who ever spoke to her. Loving homes and older siblings that already blamed themselves for not saving their sister. None of the victims had an over lap and it seemed like they didn't even live in the same town, their paths just never crossed.

"Well that doesn't help me." Clara sighed as she sat in a small conference room in the Atlanta police station. She had been given the job of finding something that linked the three girls. If they were going to find Alicia she needed to find the tiniest bit of evidence that they had something in common. Or else this Unsub would become much harder to track and more girls would die. No pressure.

Garcia had sent over everything about Becky, Jamie, and Alicia that she could find. Clara had spend the better part of three hours going through all the files and coming up with nothing, not even the same taste in Barbie dolls. She decided that she would go through everything one more time and see if she missed anything before the rest of the team got back.

"Come on girls... give me something." She sighed as she pushed the files away from her just to take a breath. When her phone rang she didn't even want to pick it up. She thought about letting it go to voicemail but she had promised Dean never to do that. His worry levels always reached record levels when she was on a case and he was alone with Gwen.

The two were best friends but he always panicked when the tiniest thing went wrong. When she was a baby he would avoid holding her for to long because he was paranoid he would drop her. But once she looked up at him with those green eyes he never wanted to let her go. It never bothered him to wake up in the middle of the night to rock her back to sleep or to check under the bed for monsters.

"What?" Clara huffed without even looking at who was calling. The small memory of Dean checking for monsters gave her the smallest bit of joy but snapped out of it before the voicemail picked up.

"Don't snap at me girl." Bobby's cranky and annoyed tone.

"I'm sorry... I didn't know it was you. Look Bobby can I call you back. We are in the middle of a case and it's bad..." She sighed.

"If I hang up you better call me back." Bobby warned. "No more of this I'll call you back when you never do."

"I know... I'm sorry." Clara sighed feeling guilty. "Look once teh team comes back we are going to deliver the profile and I'll call you back as soon as I get a chance."

"I mean it Clara if you don't so help me I'll-"

"Alright easy old man." She joked trying to lighten the mood.

"Idjit." Bobby swore before hanging up. Clara caught herself smiling for a second once she put her phone away.

"Find something?" Reid caught her smile as well and hoped she had found something to connect the girls.

"Ah... no." Clara sighed being pulled back into the job. "Do you think it's intentional that they don't cross?" She asked as he handed her a cup of coffee.

"Maybe? I mean I don't think I've ever seen three people who were so unaware of others in their city." Reid laughed. "Even people in China or New York have crossed paths before."

"Exactly..." Clara agreed.

"Maybe he is just picking them at random?" She questioned.

"What?" Hotch asked as he and the rest of the team stormed into the room. Morgan was last in and he closed the door behind him.

"I was just saying that it's weird how these three have no connections... at all." She huffed. "Maybe that was intentional." She added.

"There has to be something... we can't go out there and tell them it's random. I mean that's rare and not very reassuring that we will catch this son of a bitch." JJ got angry quickly.

"Look I'm sorry that the serial killer doesn't have a specific type but I can't do anything about it." Clara fired back quickly.

"And you went through everything?" Morgan questioned.

"Twice." Clara crossed her arms and couldn't believe they didn't agree or believe her.

"Walsh I think-"

"Wait hold up." Clara cut Morgan off. "What you think I'm lying? Seriously?" She shook her head. "Fine then you go through all this crap and tell me if these three are connected." She rolled her eyes and headed for the door.

"Walsh." Hotch ordered. Clara stopped at the door and turned. "I don't think you fully understand the circumstances here." He huffed. Clara rolled her eyes, there was the tension that this case was bound to bring out in everyone.

"Oh no, I understand." She shook her head. "I don't find anything, another girl dies." She finished her thought before anyone could say anything. "I am aware that if this Unsub is a random picker then we are screwed and a lot more girls are going to die!" She raised her voice. "But you adding presser isn't going to help them! I did my job, I found nothing. I can't just find something that just isn't there."

"We came up with nothing as well." Hotch started. "We talked to every one who knew those girls and they have never even heard of each other." He sighed. "There has to be a reason this Unsub picks these girls and if we don't find it... Alicia is going to die and more girls will as well." He pointed out again.

"I know that." She said through her teeth. She literally just said that and it being repeated angered her. "Just because I don't let cases like this get to me doesn't mean I'm not doing my job." She jabbed at everyone.

"What is that supposed to mean?" JJ asked with a huff.

"It means that every case we work is different and I understand that people tend to be more impacted by a child's death and yeah it's awful but come on! People die and whether we catch this guy or not won't change the fact that someone else's kid somewhere else is being murdered." She huffed. Everyone stared at her in horror. They couldn't believe she was being so cold. "And acting like the world is ending every time isn't going to help." She said looking at JJ who was always the most emotional about kids. "So can we focus on the case and not what happens if we fail." She sighed deeply as everyone stared at her.

It was quiet for a long time before anyone could say anything. "Let's give the profile." Hotch said and everyone looked at him.

"We don't have anything." Clara reminded him.

"We give them what we have." Hotch said as he left the room first.

* * *

"It appears that these kidnappings and murders are random, and as hard as these cases can be it also gives us a clue as to who we are looking for." Hotch spoke to the police. "This Unsub is obviously secluded and doesn't have a type. He is just angry." He shrugged.

"The amount of over kill on the two victims shows us that he may be spiralling out of control. For a kill to have such a dramatic method usually leads to built up feelings." Morgan sighed. "Which means our guy has mostly done time for violent crimes and spent a few years in prison."

"And the age of each of these girls shows up he either has a daughter the same age or had one." JJ sighed. "She mostly died in a tragic way or just doesn't have a relationship with her father and that makes him angry."

"But wouldn't he be angry at the mother for keeping the child away?" A officer spoke up.

"Not always ." Clara spoke up. "She may just not want a relationship because of his past." She pointed out. "Kids are smart that way, they know who is bad and good." She added.

"So he blames his daughter." Hotch continued. "and it won't be long before he goes after who he really wants to punish."

"So we find the daughter we find out Unsub." Reid said. "But don't be surprised if you have already interviewed the daughter. She is most likely ashamed of her father and may hide it. That's probably why we couldn't find an actual connection between the victims." He said looking over at Clara who stared back.

She snuck away from the group as they informed the police about how dangerous this man is and how important it was that he still had another girl. Clara went back into the conference room and sat down looking at the files. She went through the list of friends and when she finally noticed some missing information she rolled her eyes.

"Garcia where is the rest of Carina Bennet's file?" Clara talked loudly through the speaker.

"Who?" Penelope questioned not recognizing the name.

"Carina Bennet. She was friends with Jamie Gunderson." Clara huffed. "All you sent me was her school records and her address. What about her family?"

"Carina Bennet..." Clara could hear the keyboard clicking quickly as Penelope rushed. "She doesn't really have a family. I mean her mother died a few years ago and her father was never really in the picture. She lives with her aunt." Penelope paused. "She's apparently a very angry child. She was in the foster system for a bit because she and her aunt didn't get along. Guess the aunt just couldn't take it?" She sighed.

"And you didn't think any of that was important?" Clara huffed at Penelope. "When I asked for the files on everyone you would think that a trouble child who is distant from her father would be top of the list Garcia!" Clara snapped.

"Hey!" Morgan came into the room quickly.

"Look I gave you what you wanted and you yelling at me isn't going to save that little girl." Penelope fought for herself and she sounded hurt on the speaker. "So don't snap at me!" She yelled then hung up the phone loudly.

Clara sighed as she sat down slowly. She didn't mean to snap at Penelope, and she instantly felt guilty. She rubbed her pounding forehead angrily. "What the hell is your problem Walsh?" Morgan's booming angry voice spoke up again.

"Look I'm sorry..." Clara said sincerely. "I didn't mean to snap." She sighed again.

"So yelling at Penelope is gonna fix that?" Morgan narrowed his eyes at her.

"Well at least we know who we need to talk to next." Clara shot back.

* * *

"I don't want to talk about my dad." Carina huffed crossing her arms ass he sat back on her aunt's couch.

"I know this must be hard but it could save a little girl's life." JJ tried to sympathize with Carina.

"She's never liked talking about her father." Her timid aunt added.

"Why?" Clara looked over to Carina waiting for an answer. JJ didn't want her tom come along but Hotch said it would be helpful to have two women talk to the child.

"Because he is a deadbeat!" Carina laughed shaking her head.

"That's not very nice." Her aunt added. Carina shot her aunt an angry look and she stopped talking.

"You're aunt is right. He may have made some bad decisions in life but he is still your father." Clara added.

"Well I haven't seen him in years so I don't really have to be nice about him." Carina rolled her eyes. "Why are you asking me these stupid questions?" She asked.

"Because we think your father might have taken someone." Clara repeated what JJ had stated earlier.

"Oh my..." Her aunt gasped a bit. "Those stories on the news... you think that as Adam?"

"Adam? What's hi last name?" JJ asked quickly trying to et all the information she could before Carina started to yell again.

"Adam Gillian." Her aunt sighed. "Last I heard he was in Phoenix. I can't believe he's back..."

"Like he ever stayed long enough." Carina added.

"Where did he like to go?" JJ asked. "Did he ever take you anywhere special?"

"Nope." Carina popped her lips.

"You really could care less about what's going on." Clara stated.

"Why? It don't effect me." She huffed.

"Really? She once he's killed Alicia and he comes for you, that won't affect you?" Clara rose her voice as she stood slowly.

"Walsh." JJ warned her and Clara now yelling at this girl was not going to help but she was being so difficult and she was tired of it.

"Let's see how you feel when it's you he has a knife pointed at. Or when he starts cutting your body up and scattering the pieces around. Will it _affect_ you then?" Clara said slamming down the file with some crime scene photos. "Let's see if you are so smug and careless when you are laying bloody in the street!" She spread a few of the photos over the coffee table. Carina jumped at the sound of the file slamming in front of her. She looked down at the photo's and her eyes started to glaze over. It wasn't Clara's intention to make her cry but something needed to be done.

"You are just like him!" She stood with a sob. "Cruel!" She huffed tears rolling down her cheeks. "It's not my fault these girls are dead!"

"Then tell me something that will save Alicia's life!" Clara yelled back.

Sure yelling at a ten-year old wasn't Clara's proudest moment but she managed to scare some information out of her. JJ was pissed at her and hadn't talk to her since they left Carina and her aunt. The ride back to the station was quiet and cold. Clara didn't feel guilty but she could have handled it better.

When Clara and JJ walked into the station there was a lot of background noise. It was like a bomb had gone off and no one knew what to do. JJ rushed to the rest of the team to see what was going on but as Clara looked around she already knew. Alicia was dead.

The room started spinning as everyone around Clara finally got a handle on things. She watched from the middle of the room as everyone rushed around her. Phones needed to be answered and parents needed to be notified. Clara looked over to the conference and she saw the defeated look on everyone's faces. The guilt hit her when she saw JJ drop her head once Hotch had filled her in. Clara went to grasp a desk so she wouldn't fall over in shock but before she could JJ came storming out.

"Are you happy now!" She yelled her eyes full of fire. "You had one job while the rest of use got information! You were supposed to find that one connection and you were too late!" She yelled even louder and everyone stopped what they were doing. "You said you don't let cases like this bother you, well I hope you can live with that ten-year old's blood on your hands!" She screamed.

"This is not my fault." Clara said through her teeth, not believing it anyways.

"Keep telling your self that." JJ spat at her. Clara was both taken back by the pure anger in JJ voice and how much this case had hit her.

"Enough." Hotch ordered and JJ walked away. She was the one who had to talk to the parents, so she needed to leave.

"I..." Clara's voice was barely audible.

"Morgan and Reid go to the crime scene. Rossi see what you can find at Adam Bennet's house." Hotch said as he stared at Clara.

"Walsh and I will stay here and add Alicia to the profile. Our guy most likely keeping the girls somewhere else, that's what we'll look for." He said turning his head slowly with a nod. As everyone went about their duties Hotch looked over at Clara and seen something he had feared for a while. The look of a burnt out agent who was slipping.

"Hotch... I..." She started.

He walked up to her and turned her shoulder toward the conference room where he made her walk. He shut the door quietly behind him and she kept walking into the room. She started pacing but never turned to look at him.

"What JJ said is not true. You did your job and you came up with nothing." Hotch said.

"Nothing that got a little girl killed." She said weakly.

"Can't make up stuff that isn't there." Hotch replied.

"But I should have seen it!" She snapped and turned to face him. "I should have seen the holes in Carina's files! I should have dug deeper!" She said and Hotch watched as her anger turned to guilt and pain. He could see it growing in her eyes.

"Stop." He said walking up to her. "You can't blame this on yourself." He said trying to get her to calm down.

"How can I not." She shrugged as she looked down.

"I think we both know your mind hasn't always been 100% on this case." She looked up quickly. "That doesn't make Alicia's death your fault. Blame Adam Bennet who murdered her." He said placing a hand on her shoulder. "Is everything alright?" Hotch had to ask.

"No." She shook her head. He was surprised at her honesty. She opened her mouth to say something else but she was cut off.

Two sharp and loud gunshots went off and the sound of class shattering made Clara and Hotch drop to the floor. Hotch was blocking her view as they fell but she knew something was wrong when he didn't look up. She reached for her gun quickly and proped herself on her knees.

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO NOW!" An angry voice yelled over the yelling of a few police officers.

Clara looked down at Hotch and noticed he hadn't moved. She nudged him slightly with her knee but she only groaned. She looked up over the table and saw Adam Bennet standing just outside with two guns. One aimed at the receptionist and he other as his head.

"PUT THE GUN DOWN!" A few officers called out.

"Hotch?" She whispered. "You okay?" She asked again as the police fought to gain control over the scene. Hotch did not answer.

"I said.. PUT THE GUN DOWN!"

"Alright enough!" Clara finally got to her feet and stepped in front of Hotch's body so no more harm could come to him. "Everyone needs to calm down." She sighed aiming her gun for Adam. "Everything is going to be alright." She smiled at Adam who just stared at her. He was confused and that's what she wanted. "What seems to be the issue here?" She asked ad Adam tilted her head.

"Agent what-"

"Shut up." She ordered the officer in front of her. "I wasn't walking to you." She glared at him and he kept quiet.

"Who are you?" Adam stuttered a bit.

"Well that depends... who are you?" She asked with a sigh.

"I'm the one who's been this city's nightmare for the past week." He spoke like Clara should know who he was.

"Oh really?" She laughed. "So you are the one running around knocking over mailboxes."

" I KILLED THOSE GIRLS!" He yelled at her.

"What girls?" She laughed again and the gun that was pointed at his head was now set on her. She tightened her grip on her gun with a smirk.

"Stop toying with me!" He yelled.

"Alright... alright." She sighed. "I know you killed those girls but the real question is why are you here?" She asked. "I mean there are no ten year olds here." She said slowly taking steps closer to him. Adam was to confused to notice.

"The news keeps saying you don't have leads! But you know now! So you tell them!"

"Why would I tell them anything? You killed three little girls. Who cares who you are." She huffed.

"Because she has to see!" He shook his head, his body shaking as well.

"Who needs to see what?" Clara asked now confused.

"Carina..." His eyes got wide. "She has to see that I became something. Not just a failure. I am somebody." He said his eyes glazing over.

It was quiet after Adam finished speaking. She noticed the SUV's that the rest of the team were in speed into the parking lot. She knew she only had a few seconds before Adam stated shooting.

"And you want her to see that you are a murder?" Clara asked with a huff. "She hates you Adam. She doesn't even like saying your name!" She rose her voice and Adam stared at her in shock. "All she will know you as is the bastard that ran out on her and _killed_ three girls!" Clara said lowering her gun and putting it in her holster.

"Shut up!" He yelled and just as he aimed both guns at her the rest of the team filled in.

"She will hate you for the rest of her life!" Clara yelled.

"Walsh." Morgan and Rossi warned. She was to close to both guns.

"She will never see you as a good man. She will never love you and when you go to prison she will _never_ visit you. You will die alone in a cell." Clara spat at Adam. "Waste of space." She whispered.

"You're right." He whispered back.

"Clara..." Reid spoke up and before anyone had a chance to say anything or act, Adam raised both guns to himself. He placed both barrels under his chin. Clara watched as he pulled the trigger and he fell.

Once he fell all she saw was blood and her team looking at her horrified. Did she just get him to commit suicide? Clara did not wait for anyone to say anything. She turned her back and rushed to Hotch. He was still on the floor.

There was a small pool of blood on the floor. "Aaron?" She asked dropping to her knees. He rolled to his side and grunted.

"I'm good." he said reaching behind him and placing his hand over the small hole in his back.

"You're shot." She huffed placing her hand over the hole with more pressure.

"Nothing to serious." He laughed.

"Fine... just don't move." She ordered as she pressed harder on the wound. "Paramedics will be here soon." She sighed looking around at all the glass.

"Clara?" Hotch looked up at her and noticed how cold her face had gone. She had just seen someone pull the trigger and it was like she wasn't even phased by it. She looked down slowly and waited for him to continue. "You're slipping." He whispered trying not to upset her even more.

"Yeah... I know." She said and looked away. She knew damn well she was slipping and pulling away. She knew that if something didn't change she was going to get hurt or burn out.


	5. Chapter 5

The team was set to board the plane in a half hour. They had been given the night to rest while Aaron got the bullet removed and his back stitched. It was safe to say no one got any sleep that night. Clara sat alone in her room with her knees pulled up to her chest all night.

Her mind was still all night. She couldn't think of anything but the colour of the wall in her room. It was just a simple shade of white, but every time she blinked it splattered with blood. She would jump and the wall would go back to white. She knew she was imagination it but it was unsettling. Her eyes soon stopped blinking so frequently.

Around midnight she remembered something she promised to do. She slid her phone our of her pocket and clicked the speed dial. "What?" Bobby's grumpy voice made her smile for the first time all day.

"I told you I would call back." She laughed a bit and he sighed.

"Well I'm glad you did." He sighed. "I'm assuming you have time to talk now?" He asked.

"Yea, what did you wanna talk about?" She asked lowing her legs and crossed them.

"It's actually about Adrian." Bobby sighed.

"What about him?" Clara panicked right away and sat up straight.

"Look you ain't gonna like this but I need you to relax." Bobby huffed.

"Bobby..." Clara warned.

"He came to be a few weeks ago. He said that things were getting intense at home and asked if he could stay with me for a few days." Bobby said.

"He was with you! He ran away for three days and you didn't think to call! What the hell Bobby!" She yelled right away.

"I told you to relax!" He ordered. "He asked me not to call you or Dean and I didn't. He was fine, but he went through some of the files I had and started asking questions." Bobby sighed.

"I don't like where this is heading." Clara said as she slipped off the bed.

"Yeah well you really aren't gonna like what I let him do." Bobby sighed.

"You didn't." She whispered.

"It was an easy job. In and out. He wasn't in any real danger." Bobby tried to explain.

"_real danger?_" She laughed in anger. "Bobby every job is dangerous!" She yelled. "What the hell were you thinking!"

"I was thinking that the kid can make his own choices." Bobby fired back calmly.

"And you think hunting was a good choice for him to make! Bobby he is supposed to be normal!" She yelled. "Normal! Not a hunter!" She yelled tears coming to her eyes.

"Look I only told you because we agreed that it would only be a one time thing but I don't think he has been keeping good on his end."

"He's still hunting." Clara's breath escaped her quickly. "God..." She said rubbing her face.

"Look Clara I'm sorry I took him on a job."

"Yeah." Clara shook her head. "But you did and now he's gonna end up just like us." She said.

"What does that mean?" Bobby sounded hurt by that.

"I gotta go Bobby." She said and hung up before he could say anything. She thought about calling Dean but it was to late. If Adrian was out Dean couldn't go after him. So she tried calling Adrian's cell phone. When it went to voicemail she wasn't surprised. "Call me back." Was all she said.

* * *

When the sun rose at 6 Clara took a shower and changed clothes. She repacked her go-bag and went to meet the team so they could go home. When she saw Morgan and Reid in the lobby she knew no one got sleep. She sighed as they watched her checkout and when JJ and Rossi came down, no one said anything to her. They just headed to the airport once Hotch joined them.

Clara sat toward the back of the plane staring out the window. The grey clouds passing her gave her some ease but didn't help the guilt, worry, and her dread to go home and deal with Adrian. She sighed as the flight carried on. She could feel everyone staring at her but she couldn't bother to care. Her team wasn't her biggest problem at the moment.

"Hotch what do we do?" She heard Reid whisper. They were trying really hard not to be heard but Clara was very good at hearing things she wasn't meant to. "She's out of control lately."

"She practically told Adam Bennet to kill himself." JJ huffed. "Not to mention what she said to Carina."

"Do you think she is alright?" Reid was more concerned than anyone. The other seemed to be more angry than anything.

"I doubt it." Hotch was honest as he looked over at her. She looked up and they locked eyes for a moment before she looked away. He knew she wasn't alright and Clara didn't care. He just wanted to know how to fix it.

* * *

When the plane landed Clara was last to get off. She walked into the BAU after everyone and as they gathered around their desks she rushed to hers to grab what she needed and then wanted to leave. She placed her bag on her chair, opened her bottom drawer, and noticed something was missing. She looked around as they watched her.

"Looking for this?" Penelope walked up with what she was looking for. "I knew you would grab this after our call earlier." She sighed handing the key to Clara. "Its the only thing you keep in on your desk that means anything." She sighed. "And I know what it means when you take it." She sighed.

"I'm sorry." Clara whispered as she hugged Penelope quickly.

"Please don't. Whatever it is I'm sure we can help." Penelope begged.

"Don't what?" Morgan was first to speak up. "What's going on?" He asked.

"I'm leaving." She said looking down at her hand where she held the key tightly. "For good."

"What! Why!" Reid jumped forward.

"Because there is something I have to take care of and I can't do it if I'm here." She said looking up to Hotch's office. She walked around Reid and Penelope. She walked quickly toward his office ans shut the door behind her.

"I know why you are here and I have to at least try to talk you out of it." Hotch said like he was expecting her visit.

"I can't do this anymore." She shrugged. "And I know the decisions I have made over the past few months have gotten people killed and I fear that if I keep going I will get one of you killed." She said without emotion. She couldn't show how she felt, if she did she would fall apart in Hotch's office. "I already have to much blood on my hands.." She said quietly.

"Everyone struggles with the job Clara." He pointed out.

"I'm not just everyone." She added. "And I think I've done enough damage here." She said. "I already have to much blood on my hands.." She said quietly.

"Are you sure about this?" He asked. "Because if you leave I can't guarantee your job back when you decide to come back." he sighed. "I think Strauss has had enough of your coming and going." He sighed.

"I don't want it back." She sighed taking her badge out of her pocket. She looked down at it with a small smile. "I can't keep going like this Arron, we both know it." She sighed as she took her holster and place it with her badge on his desk.

"Clara..." He started and walked over to her. "If you ever need anything..." He started with a sad smile. "We'll always be here."

"I know." She said reaching forward and hugging him tightly. He patted her back slightly and with that Clara walked out of his office.

"Clara what's going on?" Morgan came rushing forward first.

"I'm gonna miss you guys." She smiled.

"Why? Where you going?" JJ asked.

"Well I'm going home and I'm not coming back. I quit." She shrugged as she looked at everyone.

"Is this because of what I said? Because I didn't mean it! I was just mad!" JJ started to panic.

"It's a long time coming JJ." Clara smile and hugged her. "I'm sorry I can't give you guys a better explanation but I just can't be this person anymore."

"Then what are you going to be?" Reid asked with a pout.

"I'm not sure yet." She sighed.

"Your not going back to that life are you?" Rossi asked with a sigh. Clara shook her head quickly.

"We'll always be here." Morgan said. "No matter where you are or what happens you can always come back." He said stepping forward and hugging her.

"I know." She smiled squeezing him with a sad sigh.

"This doesn't make any sense." Reid said and JJ nodded.

"I know." Clara smiled and hugged him. "And nothing I can say will make it make sense." She smiled. It was quiet for a minute as Clara looked at all their confused faces. "Listen before I go.. I just want you to know..."

"Oh come on." Derek laughed. "You aren't dying. We will see you again." He said throwing her a hug again.

"Derek's right. I mean we are family." Penelope smiled.

"Best family anyone could ask for." Clara was barely able to get through that sentence. Her eyes started to burn and she knew if she didn't leave now she would cry. "Bye." She smiled and quickly walked away from them.

A few days ago Clara had no intention on quitting. She still loved her job she just knew she wasn't doing her job right. It had been almost a year since she had even enjoyed her work. And after what happened with Adam Bennet, she just knew she was a risk to everyone.

On her way home she wondered what she would say to Dean. Would he be angry? Or would he even care. She knew it was her fault that they were drifting but she didn't know how to fix it. Maybe if she just talked to him he would understand? Then she started to think about Gwen. How were they gonna afford to keep their household going with just Dean's income. She knew she had a savings account but it wasn't enough to keep their family going.

Clara parked her car in the drive way and sighed at the sight of Dean's truck. It was Saturday and she knew he was off and he and Gwen were probably inside watching T.V waiting for her. She grabbed her bag, the key she took from her desk, and headed inside.

It was quiet when she walked inside. It was only around 1 so it was surprise Gwen wasn't running around. She closed the door quietly, setting her bag down and walked in. She threw her keys into the bowl and looked around. No one greeted her so she rushed to the kitchen. She poured herself a small glass of whiskey and swallowed it before anyone knew she was there.

"MOMMY?" Gwen's voice came from the top of the stairs. It was joyful and Clara rushed over and saw Gwen standing at the top. She was wearing a pink tutu and a blue t-shirt, the thing about her outfit that made Clara smile was the green rubber boots on her feet. Clara laughed at her daughter.

"Hi sweetheart." She said quietly. Gwen came running down the stairs trying her best not to trip over her boots. When she reached the last few steps she jumped at Clara and threw her arms around her. Clara caught the little girl and hugged her tightly.

"I missed you!" She sighed.

"I miss you too." Clara whispered and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "Where's Daddy?" Clara asked and Gwen looked around and huffed.

"I don't know?" She giggled.

"You here alone?" Clara asked a bit shocked.

"No." Gwen shook her head. "Oh! He's outside!" Gwen laughed and Clara put her down. "I'm gonna go back and play okay?" She asked and Clara nodded.

As Gwen ran upstairs Clara wondered outside to find Dean sitting on the back porch talking on his phone. She couldn't hear who he was talking to but it was someone he had to whisper with. Then she saw him smile as he said goodbye and then hung up the phone. Clara stood by the door and waited for Dean to notice her. He smirked and got up slowly. Clara noticed as he got up his jerky motions and how he wrapped an arm around his waist. She tilted her head at his pained expression and was going to say something before he even knew she was there.

"Oh... You're back." Dean's smile faded quickly once he turned and saw Clara. He dropped his arm to his side quickly.

"Wooh calm down. Don't get to excited." She shook her head with a small smirk trying to easy the tension between them and forgetting about his expression.

"Catch the guy?" Dean asked.

"Shot himself." She answered and his eyes widen a bit.

"I'm sorry." He offered.

"I'm not." she shrugged coldly. He nodded as she turned and walked in and he followed. They walked into the kitchen and Clara didn't know what to tell him first.

"New case tomorrow?" he asked and she leaned up against the counter.

"Uh no..." She shook her head and looked at the floor.

"Gwen will be happy to hear that." he said and she looked up and he smirked at her as he sat at the table. He knew by the tone in her voice and the atmosphere they needed to talk or else this would just get worse. It was quiet as they looked at each other. She sighed and sat across from him. "He'll be fine." He started.

"I don't think he will." She shook her head quickly.

"Clara he is a teenager. He has rebellion in his blood." Dean rolled his eyes at her. "Don't forget all the crazy shit we used to do when we were his age." He huffed.

"Exactly." She said quickly and sighed. "We both know the kind of trouble he can get into and-"

"You do realize I was saying we were worse." Dean interrupted her. "It's not like he is going out for something to kill! He is probably just trying to impress someone." He smirked. "I bet she is blonde and likes guys who don't care." He shrugged.

"A girl?" Clara nearly laughed. "You think Adrian's attitude and behaviour are because of a girl?" She asked.

"What else will make guys to stupid stuff?" He laughed.

"That's ridiculous." Clara shook her head. "I think Adrian is a bit more mature than that."

"Wether he is 19 or 30... a guy will always do something stupid if he knows it will get her attention." Dean smiled at Clara and she looked at him with a tilted head.

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard." She smirked.

"Pretty sure it took about five vampires, and a whole lot of stitches to get yours." Dean smirked and Clara's face and heart dropped. It was quiet for a long time as they stared at each other. Dean was trying really hard to break through the tension and he could tell by the look on her face, it was working.

"Took almost getting my heart ripped out of my chest by an angry spirit to get yours." She said quietly looking away and Dean laughed.

He got up slowly and she watched as his face winced again and his movements were jerky. He got up and walked around the small table and pulled a chair right next to her. He sat down quickly with a grunt of was no doubt pain and looked at her. Clara could see the actual happiness in his eyes, and she hadn't seen that in a while. He leaned forward putting one hand on her cheek while the other rested on her knee.

"You and I both know it was long before that." He whispered and closed the space between them.

With a soft and gentle kiss Clara's body freed of all stress, worry, and panic for a minute. Dean hadn't shown that much emotion since Gwen was born. She quickly leaned into the kiss and placed one of her hands on his cheek to pull him closer. That kiss was so full of need and pain that they were both afraid to pull away for air.

Before they could even think about separating there was a knock at the door. They both pulled away slowly and looked at each other. They both sighed and Clara got up. Dean held her hand for as long as he could until she was to far to reach. She rushed over to the door and answered it. From where he was sitting he couldn't see who it was but once they spoke he jumped up.

Clara opened the door to find a very pretty young women on her front step. She had a big smile, and long blonde hair. "Hi." She smiled brightly. "Is Dean around?" She asked.

"Who are you?" Clara asked right away and when Dean came walking up behind her with a jump in his step she had an odd feeling about her.

"Zoe!" Dean exclaimed quickly with a nervous laugh. "What are you doing here?" he asked trying to step in front of Clara, which only made her more curious and suspicious.

"Well you didn't sound to good on the phone so I just thought I'd pop by." She giggled a bit. "Plus after what happened yesterday I thought I'd bring you these." She said handing him a container.

"You made me cookies?" he asked a bit shocked. He could just feel Clara narrowing her eyes at both of them.

"What happened yesterday?" Clara asked after Dean spoke.

"Nothing." Dean answered before Zoe could talk.

"Hi... I'm Zoe." She smiled putting her hand forward to shake Clara's hand.

"Clara." She smiled politely as she shook the other women's hand tightly. "How do you two know each other?" Clara asked with a smile as she crossed her arms. They still had not let Zoe into the house and Clara had no intention on doing so. She watched as Dean sighed and looked down at the container of cookies.

"Oh we work together." She smiled. "I mean he does all the work, I just sit behind a desk and watch." She blushed.

"_Watch_?" Clara almost laughed at her phrasing.

"Yeah... I don't know why but watching people work on cars is just like the best job." She sighed happily looking over at Dean. "But sometimes it sucks..."

"Okay... well thank you for the cookies and I'll see you tomorrow." Dean tried to get her away from the house before Clara could ask more questions.

"You're coming in tomorrow?" Zoe gasped a bit. "But the doctor said you should be off for at least a week!" She said in a panic.

"Wooh... doctor?" Clara started to get confused. "What the hell happened?" She asked quickly and Dean sighed again.

"He didn't tell you!" She sighed. "Oh it was awful! I don't know how he is walking around or even alive."

"OK! Someone really needs to tell me what happened." Clara demanded quickly as her worry grew.

"It was nothing." Dean huffed. "I was under a car and one of the guys didn't lock it right so when they went to lower it the whole car came down instead of just one end." Dean rolled his eyes.

"A car fell on you!" Clara almost yelled but her voice got loud enough to get everyone's attention.

"It wasn't a big deal... just some bruising and a few days off." He shook his head

"When were you gonna tell me?" Clara asked, forgetting about Zoe.

"Right now?" Dean tried to pull a charming smile and all he got was a death glare from her.

"Well I should go... it was nice meeting you Clara... and Dean I hope you feel better." Zoe flashed him a smile as she turned to walk away.

Clara slowly closed the door as Zoe walked away and she didn't know what to address first, the pretty assistant or the being crushed by a car. She kept her back to Dean for a minute as she decided. "So a car fall on top of you and you don't think to call me?" She asked before she turned.

"You were on a case." He defended poorly.

"Really? That's your excuse?" She asked crossing her arms. "Bad move." She added. "Do you wanna try again?"

Dean sighed as walked over and placed the container on the table. He walked back over to her and smiled down at her. "The other day, we could barely even hold a conversation without it turning into a fight. And every time we find ourselves in a rough spot something always happens to one of us to make it all better." He rolled his eyes. "I wanted us to go back to normal without an injury this time." he smiled.

"You still should have told me that a car fell on you!" Clara rose her voice a bit, only she wasn't angry.

"I know." He sighed. "but I promise I'm fine." He said with a smile. "Look..." He said grabbing his shirt and lifting it. His sides were a bit blue and yellow but nothing to extensive. "Nothing life threatening." He smirked. Clara started at him for a minute and when he pulled his shirt down she closed her eyes tightly. "Oh come on... I'm sorry..." He sighed.

"I know..." She whispered rubbing her face. "This has got to stop." She said looking up at him and he sighed. "Keeping our distance from each other might just get us killed... hell it has a few time." She smirked and Dean let out a small chuckle. "We have a kid Dean..." She pointed out.

"Really?" he laughed. "I never noticed." She huffed and rolled his eyes. "Alright, alright I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the car." He huffed. "But I'm not the only one here keeping secrets." He said shaking his head at her.

"You really aren't going to let it go are you." She huffed knowing he was talking about her dreams. "Fine I'll tell you, but I don't to be answering a million questions." She huffed as she walked past him and into the kitchen. "Sam." She said as she turned and leaned on the counter. She crossed her arms as Dean stared at her. "The dreams are about Sam."

"What about him?" He asked.

"I don't remember." She lied but it looked like he bought it. She feared that one day this lie was going to come back and bite her but she couldn't tell him the trusth."The last thing I say before I wake up is Sam. Just standing an arm's length away but I can't reach him, and he can't hear me." She shrugged as she looked down.

"You call out for him?" Dean asks and Clara looks up at him.

"Well yeah." She huffed. "He's right there." She reaches her arm out to grab at nothing. "He should be able to at least see me but..." She sighed and dropped her arm.

Dean was quiet for a second before he walked up to her and put his arms around her waist. He pulled her in tightly resting his chin on her shoulder. He let out a deep sigh once she put her arms around him. Neither of them said anything. They just held that hug for as long as they could. "Are we good now?" Dean asked with a shy tone as he pulled away but still had his arms around Clara.

"Almost..." She sighed placing her head on his chest.

"What now?" he laughed and she didn't look up.

"I quit." She said once he finished his laugh. He pulled away from her quickly only one hand remaining on her hip and her head dropped. She was afraid to look up.

"You quit? Quit what exactly?" he didn't understand.

"My job." She sighed finally looking up at his confusion.

"Why?" He asked.

"A little girl died yesterday because I couldn't find what connected the victims." She sighed pulling away from Dean's touch completely. "And she died... not just went missing but was found on the side of the road disembodied." She whispered so Gwen couldn't hear her. Dean sighed and looked down.

"I'm sure that was no your fault." He shrugged.

"It was... and when I confronted the killer I practically pulled he trigger. I told him he wasn't worth the space and that he should just kill himself." She ran a hand through her hair. "And I've been making mistakes for the last month and sooner or later I was going to get someone hurt and I finally did."

"So you gave up?" Dean asked a bit shocked.

"Yes." She admitted. "I can't keep going like this. If I didn't quit how long before I got someone on my team killed. Someone would end up with out a mother, or a husband." She sighed shaking her head. "I can handle the blood I already have on my hands but not them..." She shook her head quickly and started to breathe quickly.

"Okay." Dean smirked as he stepped closer to her again. "Breathe." He ordered and she nodded taking a deep breath. "Well what now?" He asked not wanted to question her any more.

"Wait your not mad?" She asked quickly.

"Why would I be?" He laughed. "You think I would make you keep a job that caused you this much anxiety?" He asked. She shrugged and Dean pulled her into him again. He placed a light kiss on her head as she held in tight.

It was quiet again between Clara and Dean. She held onto him tightly and she hadn't felt this close to him in a long time. As he held her she felt her guilt melt away and the worry vanish. She was going to say something else but she was cut off by the loud slam of the door.

Dean and Clara jumped apart and turned to see a very angry Adrian stomping into the house. Neither of them said anything as he walked by the kitchen and didn't even look at them. He was walking quickly but Clara saw the dirt on his face and jeans. As he made his way to the bottom of the stairs he suddenly felt them staring at him.

"What?!" He turned and yelled at Clara and Dean.

"What yourself." Clara answered back. "What's got you all chafed?" She asked walking over to him. As she got closer she could see a dark circle forming under his left eye and a small cut in his neck that had stopped bleeding. "What happened to you?" She asked in a worried tone reaching forward.

"Don't." he huffed slapping her hand away. "I'm fine. Got into a fight with some guys." He shrugged backing away.

"What guys?" Dean asked and Adrian rolled his eyes.

"Oh my God why do you ask so many questions." He huffed and stomped upstairs.

Clara watched as he made it to the top of the stairs and when she saw Gwen waiting for him by his door she feared he would yell at her. "Hi." She smiled brightly at her brother but he just nudged her out of the way and slammed the door on her. Gwen raced to the edge of the stairs and looked down at Clara. "What did I do?" She asked with big tears in her eyes.

"Oh you didn't do anything." Clara smiled as Gwen ran down stairs and into her arms. "Adrian is just mad at the world." Clara rolled her eyes.

"What did the world do?" Gwen asked as she hugged her mother with a sigh.

"Not everyone can be as happy as us." She whispered and looked over to Dean. "Hey, I got an idea. How about you and Daddy go to the park and I'll see if I can get Adrian into a better mood?" She asked looking between Dean and Gwen.

"Okay!" She yelled and Clara put her down.

"Go get a sweater." Clara said as she put her daughter down and she ran. "Just try not to hurt yourself even more." Clara sighed turning to Dean.

"Are you sure you wanna handle this?" He asked stepping next to her.

"Yes." She smiled. "I have an idea what I think will get him to appreciate the normal side of life." She sighed. "Although that might mean taking him home." She sighed as she slipped her hand into her pocket and pulled out the key she took from her desk.

"Good luck." Dean placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

* * *

**HEY Y'ALL! How's everyone doing?**

**I hope you like what I've been doing so far and I'm sorry if it seems a bit like just filler but I gotta get some stuff out of the way before shit gets to messed up ;)**

**As always love all the readers and reviews so keep them coming! IF you have any comments or concerns feel free to PM me! :) **


	6. Chapter 6

Once Dean and Gwen had left for the park Clara took a deep breath and headed upstairs. She knocked on Adrian's door but he didn't answer. "Adrian... five minutes. That's all I ask." She sighed.

"Fine." Adrian called out and she walked into his room. When she walked in he was sitting on his bed with his head phones around his neck. "What?" He huffed.

"Just tell me what happened to your face." She sighed leaning on the door frame. Adrian said nothing. "Alright, will you tell me where you go at night?" She asked with a sigh. "Every night I watch you stomped up those stairs and slam the door." She paused. "Then a few hours later when I go to check on you... all I find is an empty bed." Clara added. "Dose what happened to your face have anything to do with how you spend your nights?" She asked. Clara was asking a lot of questions she knew she wouldn't get answers to. "Where you go at night, does that have anything to do with the last time you ran away and what Bobby got you to do?" Clara asked and Adrian finally looked up at her with shock. He must have thought she would never find out.

"Do not blame this on him." He growled at her and shook his head. He still sat on his bed and stared up at her.

Clara was going to say something but she stopped her self. She walked further into his room and when she saw his closet door out of the corner of her eyes she sighed deeply and rubbed her face in frustration. It was cracked open enough to see the contents. A rosary hung from the handle, there was a large bottle of water, and a duffel in the corner almost overflowing with dirty clothes. She walked over to the closet and opened it more.

"Hey!" Adrian jumped from the bed to try to stop her but it was too late. She was already tearing the clothes out of the bag. He sighed when he saw her face. He didn't understand why she looked so angry and hurt at the same time.

Clara stared at the clothes. They looked old but she knew they were new. She bought them herself. Only they no longer had tags or a fresh smell. They smelled like sweat and were stained with blood. She shook her head as she threw the clothes back into the back and picked it up. She turned to face Adrian with his duffel in her hands.

She wanted to do so many things. She wanted to chuck the bag out the window, or scream at Adrian for being stupid. But she just stood there her mind blank and her eyes just slowly glossing over. She looked down at her now shaking hand and threw the bag forward. It landed with a soft thud at Adrian's feet. Her mouth opened but closed when he looked up at her. She took a shaky breath and decided it was time for them to take a drive.

"I suggest you put some clean clothes in that thing. Throw the bloody ones in the laundry... or better yet just throw them in the garbage." She shook her head as she turned.

"Why do I need to pack clean clothes?" He laughed and she stopped. "You kicking me out?" He asked his tone getting serious.

"No.." She whispered. She should kick him out, sent him down the road see how he likes the life when it's real. But she needed to show him something first. "Just do it." She shook her head. "Be ready in 20 minutes." She ordered and left quickly.

Clara walked down the hall toward her bedroom. She slammed the door behind her and headed for te bed. She reach under and pulled out her duffle. A bag she hadn't used in years. She threw some jeans and t-shirts in it before zipping it up. She walked over to her dressed and grabbed her Glock and tucked it in the back waist of her jeans.

She pulled out her phone and called Dean. "Yeah?" He asked with a sigh.

"I'm gonna take Adrian to Lawrence." Clara spoke quickly.

"You think that will work?" Dean asked a bit confused by her plan.

"I have no idea... but it's worth a try. If that doesn't work I'll find a case."

"Wooh!" Dean stopped her quickly. "You aren't going on a hunt." he laughed. "Have you lost your mind?" When she didn't argue.

"Dean-"

"No." She knew he was shaking his head. "I'm sorry but as your _husband_ and the father of our _child, _I forbid it."

"You _forbid_ it?" Clara had to laugh. "I'm not going to overwhelm the kid, something easy. In and out. No big deal." Clara huffed.

"Very big deal!" Dean stopped her again. "No... Clara come on this is ridiculous. Why can't we just handle this like other parents. Ground him or hell kick him out if he doesn't wanna stay anymore." Dean sighed.

"I can't do that." Clara sighed as she sat on the bed slowly.

"Fine, then at least wait for me and I'll come with you." He offered.

"No. I need you to stay with Gwen. The further she is away from this shit the better." Clara huffed as he leaned forward, her head hitting her hand. "Three days tops."

"I hate this."

"Oh and I like it?" Clara argued. "Look this is my last option. If this doesn't work I got nothing else that could make him see."

"What exactly do you want him to see Clara?" Dean asked with a sigh.

"I don't know..." Clara shrugged knowing he couldn't see. "Maybe that the life we had isn't the one he wants."

"Clara I hate to side with Adrian but... our lives weren't that bad. It had it's moments." Dean said.

Clara was quiet for a second. She agreed with Dean for about a minute. "And how many of those good moments make up for all the bad ones?" Clara asked quietly. "How many of those moments would you trade to get Sam, Ellen, Jo, Ash, or John back?" She asked and Dean was quiet. "Like I said this is my last chance to show him he doesn't need to suffer what we suffered."

"Alright, but what if you don't get through to him?" He asked.

"Then he'll have to make a decision." Clara sighed. "A roof over his head and a family or the road." It was quiet. "I hope I never have to say that again." Clara sighed.

"Be careful." Dean sighed knowing he couldn't talk her out of it.

Clara hung up on Dean quickly. She needed to deal with Adrian and get this problem out of the way before it got out of hand. She sat on her bed for a second and looked down at her hands. They were shaking and she wasn't focused until the diamond on her ring caught the light. She smiled a bit as she twisted it a bit. Dean was right, a few good things came out of their lives but she didn't want that for anyone.

Clara grabbed her bag and headed downstairs. Adrian was waiting by the door. He looked almost excited to leave. "I was reading online the other night about these murders and disappearances in East Texas..."

"What about them?" Clara asked grabbing her keys from the table next to the door.

"Well maybe we could check it out." He smiled. "That's what we are doing right?" he asked once he saw her cold and tired expression.

"No." She shook her head. "Get in the car." She said opening the door for him.

"Are you going to tell me where'er going?" he complained.

"Lawrence." Was all she said before he rolled his eyes and stomped toward the car. Clara locked the door behind her and once she got to her car Adrian was waiting in the front seat, arms crossed and tired expression. She slid in quickly and started the car. "I want to know what you've been going after." She said as they drove off.

* * *

12 hours and three really loud discussions later Adrian was asleep in the back seat. They still had a few more hours to go but didn't waver. She should have pulled over so many times for a few hours of rest but it was too late for that. She drove all through the night and Adrian slept until they drove into Lawrence.

"Wake up." She shook his from the front seat. She had stopped and stared out the window for a while but once she heard a small groan come from him she huffed. "Adrian let's go." She said slamming the door closed and he jumped.

"Awake!" he nearly yelled.

"Come on." She said walking away from the car.

It was about 7 in the morning and as Adrian followed her rubbing his eyes he had no idea where they were. "Is this the part where you tell me where we are and why?" he grumped out and Clara said nothing. She stopped at the end of the street and an empty drive way. Adrian looked around and was suddenly very confused. "Clara?" He questioned once he saw how rundown the street was.

"Shh." She puffed and he looked forward to match her staring and unblinking eye's directions. "The bricks used to be a dark brown. The roof was black and the door used to be dark blue." She started. "You could never tell but this whole street had a unique look. Every door different and each family special in their own way." She sighed. "Sure they were very judgmental and no one was ever very neighbourly but you could still feel safe." She sighed.

"Safe isn't the word I would use." Adrian laughed. "Clara seriously what the hell?" he laughed again. "Why are we standing at the end of a creepy street staring at a half burnt and crumbled house?" he asked. "I mean this place is a dump."

"This _dump_ used to be my house."

Adrian stared at Clara for a minute as she smiled at what was left of the house. He sighed and watched her slide a key out of her pocket. She held it tightly and looked over at Adrian who looked away quickly.

"Not much a house left." He pointed out rudely.

"Well no." Clara shook her head as she took a few steps forward. "The police ruled it as a homicide. Still unsolved and no one wants to by a house were a father got ripped to shreds." She added and looked at him as they both walked up the cracked path. "Soon this neighbourhood went to shit. No one wanted to live here with a killer on the loose. So people left but no one came." She shrugged and stopped at the front door that was now leaning of the hinges. "I guess someone thought it was best to burn it down." She shrugged.

"They didn't do a very good job." Adrian huffed as he looked at Clara.

She sighed and closed her eyes. Her face washed of all smiles or anger and for a long time it was just blank. She took a deep breath and stepped in front of Adrian and opened the door. It creaked open slowly and when it finally opened the inside was dark, despite all the holes in the walls that let in some light. Clara stepped in first and Adrian followed a bit confused and nervous. She walked through the doorway and into the house. Just to the right was a table with only two legs and a broken mirror hanging over it.

The stairs were in front of them but half way up they collapsed. Holes in the walls and dust every where. Clara stepped in front of Adrian and turned him toward a wall on the right of the door. It was untouched by the burns and the wallpaper was faded.

"Who thought it was a good idea to have a maroon wall?" He joked and Clara said nothing.

"That wall was white." She said looking over at him. "The whole house was white at one point." She said coldly. He could tell she was tired of his jokes. "That is my father's blood." She said suddenly and he jumped at the tone in her voice. "That's where the hellhounds tore him apart." She said balling her fists at her side. She pointed toward the door. "And that's where John Winchester dragged me from the house before the dogs could get at me." She said and Adrian kept his eyes on her. "I could hear his last scream from the street." She said pointing across the street.

"Why are you telling me this?" Adrian said in a low tone.

"I want you to imagine that." She said.

"Imagine what?" he looked up at her quickly.

"I want you to imagine what it was like to hear your father scream for his life while invisible dogs from hell ate him!" She rose her voice a bit to get to her point. "I want you to imagine what it was like to live with that everyday!"

"I don't have to imagine it!" He yelled quickly. "I know exactly what it feels like to hear someone scream and beg! I know exactly what it looks like when someone you love is killed!" He yelled again and Clara nodded. This is what she wanted. "Incase you forgot I killed my mother!"

"I didn't forget." Her voice got low again. "But you did." She added and his eyes popped.

"Forget!?" He laughed. "I will never forget that! I shot her a dozen times! I couldn't stop myself, I had no control! I think about it every damn day!" He got louder and started to fling his arms with each sentence. "When I close my eyes I see her! I go to sleep I wake to her screams!" Clara nodded and waited for him to finish. His eyes started to water and one tear dropped before he spoke again. "I couldn't save her!"

"Exactly." She stopped him and pointed at him. "You couldn't save her. A demon took your body and used it to kill your mother." She said and he started at her with tears in his eyes. "Then when it finally realized you... you were alone. No one else around to help you and no one to share your pain." Clara took a deep breath.

"That's why I go out at night!" He yells and Clara backs up at the anger in his expression. "I don't want anyone else to ever have to go through that! I can't just sit in my bed while people die! Not when I can do something about it!" He was making a good argument but he kept going. "I want my revenge for what those bastards did to me!"

"Exactly!" She stopped him again. "That's all you want. You want revenge." She shook her head. "But you will never get it." She said and he nearly growled at her. "All you will get is more pain and a few dead people!"

"How can you say that! You got your revenge! Sam and Dean got their revenge!" He yelled.

"And how much have we lost in the process?!" Clara pointed out. "Revenge was all we cared about and when we finally got it, it didn't make a difference! We were still people who had lost our families! People who killed others and we had no one to actually care about us." Clara shook her head, her own eyes starting to burn.

"But you stopped a demon from killing people. You went on to be the best hunters out there." He added.

"Adrian, people are always dying and there is always another hunter." She shrugged. "And all of them think they have a good reason for doing their job but eventually they realize that reason doesn't exist anymore." She sighed.

"Is that what happened to you?" He asked almost angry at her for quitting the job.

"I guess." She shrugged. "I guess I was just tired of watching people I love die." She shrugged. "I never really wanted that life to begin with so it was hard for me to go back."

"Would you go back?" He asked quickly. "If you had a good reason?"

"What kind of reason?" She asked crossing her arms.

"Killing Crowley." He said coldly.

"No." She said in a booming tone.

"Why not!" He yelled. "Clara he killed my mother! Tried to kill me and Dean! Why haven't you gone after him yet!?" He was getting angry and Clara hated the yelling.

"I killed the demon that hurt you and your mother." Clara said quietly. "Look I brought you here to show you what happens to hunters and to tell you that this life isn't something I would wish on my worst enemy." Clara shook her head as she walked past him toward the door. "But if you don't see that I'm just trying to protect you then fine. Whatever. You want to hunt, go and hunt." She shrugged as she stopped in the door way. "Like you said... I'm not your mother and I won't stop you." She turned.

"When did you get so scared of a demon!" Yelled after her and she froze. "You used to drop them like flies! You were the almighty Clara Walsh! Queen demon hunter!" He yelled and Clara closed her eyes as he walked up behind him. "Now your just a house wife." He spat at her.

"That's right." She said without turning. "I am _just_ a house wife. Something that most hunters will never get, in this life or the next." She huffed. "Most of them die by their 30's because they think they are invincible." Clara turned quickly. "Which I thought I was back then! I thought I could go after whatever I wanted and nothing bad would happen because demons used to run from _me_!"

"Exactly! You can go back to that! We could do it together." Adrian smiled.

"And you think hunting down the King of Hell is the way to make them fear us?" She laughed. He nodded quickly. "That will only let every demon know that they are free to do whatever they like whenever they want."

"What?" Adrian was confused.

"Crowley is scum and trust me I would love to stab him in the face but he controls the others." She shook her head. "Plus he has made good on his end of the deal so-"

"Deal!" Adrian exclaimed. "You made a deal with that son of a bitch?"

"No, Cas did." Clara sighed. "He did it to save us and he made sure Crowley and anything working for him would stay far from us!" She yelled again and Adrian jumped. "He has kept up his end of the deal so no one is going after him." Clara shook her head.

"What was Castiel's end?" Adrian asked.

"That's between them." Clara huffed. Adrian rolled his eyes and looked at her. "I don't know, okay?" She lied and started to walk up the path again.

"So that's it?" He asked not moving. "You drive almost 16 hours just to show me a house?" She sighed.

"No, I was hoping you would take my word for it and just stop now before you are in too deep and you can never get out." She sighed and turned back around. "But your old enough to make your own decisions." Clara shrugged and walked up the path.

Adrian sighed and followed her. He walked behind her and when they got in the car neither of them said a word. Clara drove toward the edge of town and the sun was slowly disappearing so she pulled into a motel. It was run down and pretty sketchy. Adrian eyes the building as Clara went to check them in. She sighed as she unlocked the door and Adrian watched as she threw her bag on the bed closest to the door.

"This place is disgusting." Adrian was grossed out by the colour of the walls and sink.

"I've stayed in worse places." Clara said from the bed. She had already laid down and was staring up at the ceiling.

"Couldn't you have sprung for a nicer place." He asked with a bit of an uneasy tone.

"Why? It's only one night." She huffed. "Plus you should get used to dumps like this. If you wanna live the hunter life, this is probably the nicest place you could find." She rolled her eyes.

"And why is that?" He huffed.

"Well sometimes to save the little money you have, it's better to find an abandoned house and just rest there." She shrugged.

"Little money?" he asked slowly sitting on his bed across from Clara.

"Yeah." She shrugged again. "Sam and Dean used to hustle pool to get extra money, oh and fake credit cards." She nodded. "Other hunters sometimes resort to flat out stealing or crashing in their car." She sighed. "Being a hunter isn't exactly a good paying job." She looked over at him and she could tell by the expression on his face all this was just hitting him.

"I knew that." he tried to cover as he laid down.

"Well we should get some sleep... we leave in the morning." She sighed getting up to lock the door and shut the light off.

"You got another case tomorrow?" he asked before she shut the lights off.

"No." She shook her head. Clara sighed as she lay back down. "Get some sleep." She said rolling onto her back and trying to close her eyes. She knew Adrian was sitting on his bed staring into the dark and she assumed he would go to bed soon.

* * *

The loud crack of thunder woke Clara up with a jolt. She sat up and nearly threw the blankets off the bed. She took a sharp breath in as she looked around. She couldn't see anything and just as she was about to get up and turn the lights on a bright flash of light called to her.

"Clara!" It was Cas's voice. Clara looked around quickly and suddenly he was standing in front of her.

"Cas?" She jumped at the sight of him. She ran over to the light and switched it on. "What the hell Cas?" she asked rubbing her eyes and looking back at him. He looked tired, like human tired. She tilted her head at him. "Are you okay?" She asked a bit concerned.

"No." He nearly groaned out. He stumbled forward and she reached out to catch him.

"Wooh... easy." She said trying to keep him balanced. "Here... sit." She said making him sit on the bed. That's when Clara looked around. It was to quiet. She looked over to Adrian's bed and he wasn't there. "Son of a..." She sighed deeply.

"He's fine." Cas started and calmed her a bit.

"You know where he is?" Clara asked sitting next to him quickly.

"I always know where they are." Cas sighed closing his eyes. "He is down the street at a bar." Cas said.

"What? he is only 19!" Clara nearly jumped.

"Relax. He isn't in any danger right now." He said putting a hand on hers.

"Cas... your hands are cold." She said grabbing both of them to warm them.

"Well seeing as my Grace is slowly losing it's power, the cold is the least of my problems." Cas said unable to sit straight.

"Why is your grace running out?" Clara asked quickly.

"Because I am losing the battle and the more I continue to defy Raphael the more of my Grace is taken." He sighed.

"I thought you and Crowley had a way to defeat him." Clara said calmly. "It's been almost three years. I thought you would have won by now." Clara was confused.

"Crowley has not found the doorway." Cas sighed. "So I've been fighting with everything I got." Cas tried to stand but Clara kept him down. "And it's not enough."

"Then what are you doing here?" Clara asked. "Shouldn't you be finding another angel to power up with?" She asked with a shrug and Cas smiled weakly at her.

"I'm afraid it doesn't work like that." He said. "I came here to... rest." he sighed. "You and Dean are still warded against angels so they can't find you." He sighed.

"Alright..." Clara smiled. It was quiet for a second while Cas tried to keep his eyes open. "Do you wanna lie down?" She asked and Cas shook his head. "Do you want some water?" She asked and he opened his eyes and shook his head. "Okay you gotta help me then... sick kids I can handle but what do I do with a sick angel." She smiled sweetly.

"Sick." he laughed. "Sick isn't the word Clara." He shook his head. "More like dying." His eyes closed again as he leaned forward putting his head in his hands.

"Well I hate that word." She said. "You're an angel... you aren't supposed to die." She huffed. "So just tell me what I can do..." she said slipping off the bed and kneeling in front of him. Cas looked down at her with red eyes. He looked so defeated that Clara didn't know if her offer would do much.

"You are a good friend, but there is nothing you can do." He sighed.

"Are you sure?" She asked reaching for his hand that was now shaking. "Come on there is always something." She smiled.

"Not this time. I just have to wait for Crowley to find the door and..." He paused. "Then I can defeat Raphael. I just need some rest." He sighed.

"Well then rest." She said standing up and making him lie down. "Close your eyes and sleep."

"Angels don't sleep." He said one his head hit a pillow.

"Well then just be still for a minute." She said sitting next to him.

"You should go get Adrian." Cas sighed while his eyes fought to stay open.

"Is he in trouble?" She asked quickly.

"Not yet but... just go get him. I'll be fine." he smiled up at her.

"Are you still going to be here when I get back?" She asked and she didn't get an answer. His eyes were so heavy that they closed and didn't open. She reached forward and looked for a pulse. She had to make sure he was still alive. "You poor thing." She sighed pressing a soft kiss on his head.

* * *

Clara could tell this was not going to end well the minute she walked into that bar. It was loud and people were yelling while a fight went on in the middle of the dance floor. Clara sighed as she pushed her way through the crowd. Everyone was to busy yelling at the two fighting to notice her.

For a 19-year-old he was doing pretty well considering the people he was around. He and a larger biker were circling each other. both had blood on their faces and it looked like Adrian had already taken a beating. Clara took a deep breath once Adrian started talking.

"Come on big baby! That all you got!" He laughed while his opponent swung at him. A fist to the face was something a lot of people would see as a big deal but Adrian fell back but jumped back up. "Ou that almost hurt." He laughed.

"Keep talkin' kid! You'll be lucky to walk outta here alive!" The other shouted.

It was the sight of the knife that made Clara jump in. He had pulled it from his jeans and Adrian didn't see it. She walked up behind Adrian and before he could doge the knife she pushed him right out of the way. He fell to the ground and she took the knife to the arm. She clenched her jaw at the slight pain.

"Now that you have made me bleed are you done?" She asked in a quiet tone and the man laughed.

"I want to make him bleed! Not some cheerleader." He laughed as Adrian pulled himself off the floor.

"Cheerleader?" Clara laughed right away. "You think that's what I am?" She asked and the man scoffed at her. "Well tell you what tough guy, I'll give you this once chance to back off before I make you cry to your mommy." She smiled putting her hands on her hips.

A few gasps followed her threat and angry huff from Adrian. "What are you doing?" He asked as he rushed to her side trying to make her back off his fight. "I don't need your help! I had this guy right where I wanted him." He whined.

"Adrian back off." Clara turned to him with fire in her eyes and he shook his head.

He stepped back a bit and the bigger man laughed. "That's right little boy listen to mommy." Clara didn't have a chance to react before he threw his knife right at Adrian. A grunt came from Adrian as the knife stuck in his shoulder.

"You are gonna wish you never woke up this morning." Clara's anger blew over the limit and she jumped at the guy. he didn't even see her jumped forward and kick him in the stomach. He stumbled back and she reached and grabbed his collar and pulled him forward only to punch him back with all her strength. He grunted and got one punch to her face in before she kicked him in the groin and he fell to the ground.

Clara didn't have time to look over her shoulder to make sure Adrian was alright because she was now to busy beating this guy's face in. She pushed him to the ground and climbed on top of him and continued to punch him until blood and tears dripped from him. Clara climbed off once she knocked him out. She turned quickly, her fists on fire and knew she wasn't finished.

A few more men had decided to jump at Adrian while he was trying to get the knife out of his shoulder. One kicked him in the stomach while the other punched him in the face. Adrian didn't have time to defend himself before a third man tore the knife from his shoulder and stabbed him a few more times.

Clara jumped on the back of the man with knife while she threw her arms around his neck. He choked and swore and then dropped the knife. He stumbled back and fell to the ground, landing on Clara. She swore and pushed his uncontentious body off. She kicked him a few times once she got free. Her ankle was now throbbing from behind fallen on but she turned to attack the next guy who was coming at her.

He lunged at her with his fist flying forward and she dodged it and grabbed his hand. She twisted his whole arm enough to make him cry out in pain. She lifted her leg and kicked him back popping his arm out of it's socket. Once he was on the ground she moved on to the last guy who was still beating on Adrian.

He had gotten in a few good punches but once Clara stepped up to him he let Adrian go, he then fell to the floor. Clara stepped between Adrian and his attacker and she took a deep breath. They stared at each other for a minute and he made the first move. He smirked and reached forward grabbing her shirt and pulling her closer. He let her shirt go and back-handed her and she fell to the floor.

"Clara?" Adrian choked out when he saw her fall. She had fallen hard and she was already bleeding from her mouth. He tried to get up but he couldn't move. "Clara get up!" He nearly screamed once he saw the man rush to her and climb on top of her.

He grabbed her shoulders and started banging her body to the floor over and over. He was laughing as Clara finally opened her eyes to her head hitting the floor. She reached up and broke free of his grip. She pulled her body up and connected her elbow to his mouth. He swayed to the side and she kicked him off of her. Once he hit the floor she climbed on top of his and started punch his face in as well. Her fists were already cut up and bleeding that she couldn't tell his blood from hers.

"Clara!" Adrian's cry made her stop. She look over and saw how much he was bleeding. She looked back down at the man under her and she stood slowly.

She said nothing as she made her way over to Adrian. The whole bar grew quiet as they watched her kneel down and help Adrian up painfully. She stared back at the others while she limped out of the bar with Adrian hanging off her and blood dripping from both of them.

* * *

"Go sit on the bed." Clara ordered once they made it back to the motel. Adrian could barely walk on his own but she was so angry that she made him limp toward his bed. Clara flicked the lights on and when she saw Cas was still passed out on her bed a small sense of calm washed over her.

Adrian sat on his bed and looked over at Clara's bed. "What is he doing here?" he asked in a weak tone.

"Resting." She answered coldly as she walked over with the first aid kit. "Remove your shirt." She ordered and he did as she asked. "Should stitch these before you lose more blood." She sighed to herself as she got the rubbing alcohol out and started to clean his wounds. "This is gonna sting." She warned and when the alcohol touched his skin he took a sharp breath but tried not to say anything.

"You aren't saying anything." Adrian pointed out after about fifteen minutes of silence. He had seen Clara get angry before but never this angry. He was used to her yelling at him but she hadn't said anything since they walked in. That made him nervous. "Is Cas okay?" He asked looking over to the other bed where the angel slept quietly. Clara looked up at Cas and nodded but then looked back down at the stitch she was trying to close. "I didn't lose too much blood... so that's good." He tried to smile but when Clara paused once he spoke he knew it was taking everything she had to not start screaming at him. "Okay Clara, please say something." he nearly begged once she went back to fixing his cuts.

"What would you like me to say Adrian?" She asked looking up at him. He nearly shivered at the ice in her voice.

"I don't know? How stupid that was? Or how I should smarten up... I don't care." he sighed.

"Why waste my breath." She shrugged as she placed a bandage over a gash. He flinched at her presser and she let go. "You won't listen nor will you care. So why bother?" She asked finally looking at him.

Adrian didn't know what to say so he looked away. He looked over at Cas. He could feel the disappointment in Clara's gaze and he couldn't handle it. he wondered if anyone else disappointed her as much as he did. Then something finally clicked in his mind.

"You saved me." He said with confusion. She stood slowly and nodded. "That's all I want to do." Adrian said and Clara sighed as she walked over to the table placing some bloody rags down. She leaned on the table with her back facing him. "I want to save people..." He sighed.

"That is very brave..." She started quietly. "But what about the ones you can't save?" She asked turning around and crossing her arms.

"What?" he asked.

"You can't save everybody Adrian. Most of the time all you will be doing is running from a dead body." She sighed. "Hunters only save about 10 percent of the people they are trying to help." She sighed. "Sooner or later the body count is gonna start rising... are you ready to handle that?" She asked with a sad sigh.

"I never thought about that." Adrian sighed as she wrapped his arms around himself trying to stop the pulsing pain.

"And it isn't just the body count... it's the scars." She sighed as she walked over and sat next to him as she threw him a shirt. "You know very well how many times Dean and I have been hospitalized. But its the nights where a hospital is out of the question, those nights leave scars." she sighed. "and sometimes those scars are left by people we love." She sighed as she looked down at her arms.

"Sam left those." Adrian said as Clara turned her arms to face up and show the scars Sam had left years ago.

"And every time he looked at them all I could see was guilt. Guilt kills people Adrian. It isn't just the knives, guns, demons, monsters, or other hunters. It's the pain, the guilt, and the body count that kills people in the end." She sighed.

Adrian was quiet for a second as he looked down at Clara's arms. He had read so much about her and the Winchester's that he sometimes forgot that they were real. He forgot that the people in those books are the ones who saved him. He forgot how hard it was for Clara to achieve a normal life and how much Dean had lost to come this far.

"I'm sorry." Adrian's voice broke as he looked up at Clara. His eyes started to glaze over and it nearly broke Clara's heart.

Clara looked over at him and smiled for the first time all day. she had finally made him see that this isn't the life he wanted. She sighed in relief and put and around his shoulders. She pulled him in for a hug and once she latched her arms around him he squeezed tightly.


	7. Please read! :)

_**Hey Y'all!**_

_**I have no idea if people are still ready, or if people have just given up but I would just like to leave this little note here:**_

_**So I've already established the life that Clara and Dean have had the past four years and how normal it has been until Adrian went a bit rouge. Anyways I would just like to take this time to say that shit is about to hit the fan. I'm done with the boring house life! I wanna see more Soulless!Sam and Crowley! I want some chaos! Anybody else?**_

_**If anyone has any ideas they would like to shoot at me about Sam and Dean seeing each other again or how Dean will react I would freaking love to know because I am so torn! I have a few ideas but I don't know which one to pick! But I would love to hear from y'all! So please let me know what you think and any ideas you have! :) **_


	8. Chapter 7

Clara never saw Cas again after that night. He was gone by the time she or Adrian woke up. She tried calling him countless times but he never answered. He would still check in on Gwen every so often and Clara never understood what they talked about. It drove her crazy why he took a liking to her daughter but Gwen liked the visits. She would come running into the bedroom in the morning after Cas had gone.

"Mommy! Daddy!" She would jump up and down on the bed until they woke up.

"What?" Dean would always groan out as he sits up quickly.

"Cassy!" She giggled. She made a nickname for him because she couldn't say his name. "Cassy came tonight!" She would giggle and Dean would always get a bit angry.

"Oh yeah? What did he want?" He would asked and Clara would roll her eyes.

It's never anything important. He just sits and talks to her. Clara is always touched when she hears the stories he tells her. She doesn't understand most of them but she knows it's Cas's way of telling her and Dean that is is okay. It's the day the stories and the visits stop that worries them both.

"Hey Gwen?" Clara looks over at her daughter who is brushing a Barbie's hair. Dean is sitting next to Clara and they both sigh. "Has Cassy visited you at all this week?" Clara asks and Gwen is quiet as she thinks.

"No... It's been a while." She sighs.

Almost three months since Cas had stopped in to check on Gwen or to tell her a story. It worries Dean and Clara but they hoped if he needed help he would come to them. So they don't speak of it for a while. The time passes and soon Gwen is starting to ask questions. Dean tells her that he is busy and will come soon and Clara just nods. She doesn't know how to tell her he won't be coming back.

"Do you think..." Clara questions one night as the two are getting ready for bed. She can't finish her sentence. She sighs as she places her earrings on the dresser and turned to face Dean. "Do you think..." She starts again and stops.

Dean is sitting on his side of the bed tearing his t-shirt off. He had a long day at work and the lay offs aren't helping his work load. He doesn't hear her the first time but when she speaks up he paused before throwing his shirt to the ground. He knows the end of that sentence and he doesn't like it either.

"I don't know." He answers and she sighs. Dean looked up and over at Clara who is now staring at the floor as she walks over to her side of the bed. He wants to smile at her shorts and tank top but the mood is long gone now. She sits slowly and pushes herself to lean back on the head board. "I hope not." He sighs and leans back with her.

They are a few inches apart and they both sigh. For Dean it has been almost three years since he last saw his friend, and for Clara it's only been a few months. Dean doesn't know about the last visit and Clara knows she can't tell him. It's quiet for a while before anyone says anything.

Dean and Clara both look over at each other with a sad smile. "Shouldn't we look for him?" She asks her head tilted to the side and he looks into her sad eyes and wishes he could change them.

"Where would we even start?" Dean makes a good point and Clara nods. "I'm sure he's fine." He smiles trying to reassure her. But she knows better, she knows what he looked like a few months ago. "I gotta get to work a little earlier tomorrow so..." Dean sighed as he slowly leaned over and kissed Clara's lips gently. She hummed when he pulled away, that smile was better then the sad one.

"He better be paying you overtime for the extra hours you are putting in." Clara smiled as Dean laid down and she leaned over and turned the lamp off.

"Yeah right." Dean laughs. "Pretty sure we have a better chance at being eaten by wolves." he jokes and Clara laughs slightly. "What are you and Gwen gonna do tomorrow?" Dean asks as his eyes slowly close.

"I'm taking her to Aaron's. The team has the weekend off so Gwen is gonna play with Jack and Henry while I catch up with the others." Clara smiles at herself.

"Good." Dean says quietly.

"Probably be there all day, so don't be alarmed if you come back to an empty house. You know how Penelope likes to ramble." They both laughed a bit then it was quiet. Clara was staring at the dark ceiling when she felt Dean fidget a bit. She looked over and noticed he was still on his back.

It didn't take long before Clara curled up next to Dean. She placed her head on his shoulder and one arm around his bare chest. She sighed deeply and she felt him tighten his hold on her. "Goodnight." He hummed placing a kiss on her forehead.

Dean woke up the next morning to his phone buzzing. He had set two alarms just to make sure he woke up in time. The sun hadn't come up yet and when he opened his eyes he noticed how he and Clara shifted during the night. He smiled every time he woke up before her. They always managed to move together during the night.

This time they were on their sides squished together and she was holding his arm around her waist tightly. He almost didn't move because he didn't want to wake her but once she heard the buzzing of his phone she moved. He watched as she took a deep breath and sighed while letting his arm free. She pulled the blankets closer and around her shoulders to block the light from his phone.

He hated waking up so early and leaving. He would much rather be beside her or making Gwen and Adrian breakfast. But with Clara without a job he needed extra money. Of course he didn't mind working the extra hours just as long as Clara was happy and not miserable. So he sighed and tried his best not to disturb Clara. He crawled out of bed and into the shower right away.

He was till half asleep by the time he had his first sip of coffee after his shower. He walks over to his phone and sighs at the voicemail that was left not even twenty minutes ago. "Hey Dean..." Zoe's happy tone made Dean sigh again. "I just wanted to call and make sure you remembered that you told the boss man you would come in early." She giggled a bit. "See ya soon."

When Dean pulls into the parking lot of the auto shop Zoe is waiting outside. She looks tired but she has a happy smile on. She jumps to her feet when she sees him get out of his truck. "Morning!" She calls to him and he flashes her a fake smile. "How are you?" She asks as he unlocks the door to the shop and she follows him in.

"Peachy." he rolls his eyes and she giggles as she playfully slaps him on the shoulder.

As the day drags on Dean can't help but feel like something or someone is watching him. He is under a Pontiac when the feeling gets worse. He pushed out from under the car and sits up for a second. He looked around and isn't satisfied when he notices no one but Zoe is in sight. She is sitting just outside the garage at her desk. She was on the phone and Dean looked around again. He hadn't had a feeling this strong in almost four years.

"Dean?" Zoe's voice made him jump.

"What?" He asked turning to find her standing behind him with a confused smile.

"You alright?" She asked. He didn't answer he just looked around again. Zoe tilted her head and followed him around as he checked every corner of the garage. "Dean?" She questioned quickly when he looked confused.

"What?" he was annoyed.

"What are you doing?" She asked and he finally looked at her.

"Nothing." He finally snapped out of his daze. "Just looking for something..." he smiled weakly and sighed as Zoe stared back at him awkwardly.

"Okay... I'm gonna get some lunch you want anything?" She asks before she leaves.

'A bottle of whiskey would be great.' Dean thinks as Zoe looks at him. "No I'm good... thanks." He sighed.

"Are you sure you are alright?" Zoe asked one more time before she turned to leave. Dean smiled at her and nodded and she turned slowly. She looked unsure if she should leave him but when she turned around and left Dean exhaled quickly.

Maybe it was just the long hours or lack of sleep? Or maybe he was just being paranoid? There are at least ten more things that could be wrong, but Dean was sure something was going on. He went back to work quickly to get his mind of off his odd feelings but every so often he would get them again. He would push out from under a car and look around. If the lights flickered he would nearly jump up with a crowbar read to fight.

Zoe would check in every so often but he would just wave her off and she left him alone. The sun was going down when she checked on him one more time. She was headed home and wanted to make sure he didn't stay to late. He told her to go home and that he would see her tomorrow.

The sun was long gone by the time Dean finally started to make his way home. It was past 11 and he was beat. He was dirty, tired, and still paranoid. His fifteen minute drive was taking longer than usual. He was driving under the speed limit as his eyes darted all over the streets. When he came to a red light he leaned his back and placed his head on his steering wheel. He really needed sleep.

"HELP!" A women's cry made Dean look up and frantically search for the origin. "PLEASE! HELP!" She screamed again from across the street. Dean quickly pulled off to the side of the road and leapt out of his truck. He grabbed his handgun from under his seat and made his way across the street to what looked like an empty house.

The for sale sign had been placed on the lawn at least a month ago and no one had come to look at it. The house was dark, empty and the door was locked. But Dean knew the scream came from inside. He looked around and over his shoulder at least a dozen times before he picked the back door lock. It took him longer than usual, but once he was inside he made his way through the house.

No one was there. No one had been there for a while. Dust and dirt collected in the corners and as Dean looked around he noticed that house could use from repairs. The stairs were rickety and the floor board creaked with every step.

"Hello?" He called out once just to make sure no one was hurt or in the house. When no one answered he turned to leave. Just out of the corner of his eyes he noticed something was off. The wall behind him was three different colours. When he turned he saw one colour that usually equaled danger.

The wall had a claw mark scratched near the bottom and just above it was a hand print smeared with blood. He stepped closer to see how fresh the blood was and when he noticed it was still warm and wet he looked around quickly again. How did that blood get there and what made those marks?

The ring of his phone nearly gave him a heart attack. He jumped and answered it quickly. "Yeah?" He didn't look at who was calling.

"Hey," Clara's voice beamed and made him smile. "You on your way?" she asked with a sigh.

"Yeah," he paused as he looked around at the house. "Half way home." He said as he left quickly and tried not to leave any fingerprints behind as he left.

"Good, I got a surprise for you." Clara's voice was low and flirty.

"Is that right?" Dean chuckled as he climbed back into his truck. "You know I hate surprises." He teased.

"I think you'll like this one." She giggled. "So hang up and hurry up." She ordered.

"Yes ma'am." He did as he was told. Dean threw his phone to the passenger's seat and sat in his truck for a second. He wanted to take off and rush home but he couldn't just forget what he just saw and heard. He sat back in his seat and looked down at his hands. They were both shaking slightly as he tried to put the gun down. He hadn't held that gun since he first showed up on Clara's door step.

That day flashed by him suddenly. Sam jumping into the pit. Cas coming out of nowhere to heal him and Bobby. Then just the silence that Dean endured on his way to Clara's. He remembered what it was like, heart-broken, alone, and in so much pain. He knew he didn't want to go back to that but he couldn't help but think about the jobs he could be working right now. He sighed as he shoved that gun back under his seat.

"No." he whispered to himself. He didn't want to go back, it was hard enough not to have Sam with him but to go back to hunting alone would be worse.

Dean pulled back onto the road and instead of speeding through the red lights like he should have, he took his time. His mind was racing, he was torn between what was going on around him and what Clara was doing. He sighed once he pulled into the drive way. He sat in his truck for a minute as he looked into the house.

All the lights off except the one in the living room. He smiled to himself as he walked up to the door and opened it quickly. He walked in, dropped his keys, and headed over to the living room. He half expected Clara to meet him at the door or at least rush to greet him, but she didn't. He smirked when he noticed she had fallen asleep on the couch.

He was only looking at her for a second before she woke with a jump. "Dean!" She nearly yelled. "What the hell?" She asked sitting up right away. "Did you get lost?" She laughed at him.

"What do you mean?" He questioned as he walked over and sat on the couch next to her.

"You said you were half way home. Why did it take you so long?" She asked tilting her head as she face him and tucked her legs under her.

"What? Clara you called like three minutes ago." he laughed and when she didn't laugh his smile dropped.

"I called you half hour ago." She said, her smile fading. "What were you doing?" She asked with a sigh.

"Nothing..." He paused and tried to think of an excuse quickly. "Got stuck behind an old lady." he laughed. "She was going like 10 miles an hour." he sighed as he sat back and leaned back on the couch. "Tried to get around her but she was swerving too much." He shrugged and his eyes were slowly closing.

"Oh..." Clara sighed as she placed her head on the back of the couch and it was quiet for a second. She watched as his eyes slowly started to close. She smiled and sighed.

"So what was this surprise I had to rush over here for?" he asked dropping his head to look over at her.

She smiled at him and snuck a bit closer. "Listen." she whispered. They were both quiet long enough to hear nothing. "You hear that?" She asked as the both looked up and listened to the silence.

"It's quiet." he whispered back.

"Adrian is working the night shift, and Gwen is with Derek and Penelope." She sighed as Dean's eyes bounced around the room quickly.

"So we are alone?" he asked, his voice low and he smiled. Clara nodded quickly and Dean flashed her a devilish smile. "About damn time." He said leaning forward grabbing her legs and pulling her under him as he leaned over her. She giggled at his sudden movements and her face flushed red. He smiled down at her and before he leaned down to kiss her she lifted her hand.

It was warm as it rested on his cheek. She stroked his cheek gently with her thumb and Dean hummed at the tender touch. He leaned down quickly and captured her lips before anything could interrupt them. She threw her arms around his neck and pulled him down further. As he pushed his tongues against her she gripped at his shirt to pull it off. He only pulled away long enough to throw both their shirts away.

They both fell asleep on the couch that night. Dean's button up shirt draped over Clara and a blanket covering them both. She was pressed to his side comfortably and her around wrapped around his chest. Clara was first to fall asleep and Dean watched her for a while. She was so peaceful that it made his uneasy feelings about the day melt away. And the small smile on her face made realize he was over reacting.

That was the best five hours Dean had slept all month. He wanted to shoot his phone when it started buzzing. The alarm was going off and when he didn't move right away to turn it off Clara sighed. "It's not gonna stop itself." She whispered and he sighed. He reached over to the table, trying his best not to make Clara move. He pressed the snooze button and Clara laughed. "Nine more minutes isn't gonna be any better." he sighed opening her eyes and tilted her head to look up at Dean.

"I disagree." he smirked and closed his eyes.

"Come on." Clara said as she tried to push up but Dean' arm around her shoulders wouldn't let her move. "Dean." She laughed. "You gotta get up, and I gotta go upstairs." She said trying to get up again.

"No." He protested as he pulled her back down and this time put both arms around her to keep her still.

Clara laughed again. "Dean..." She whined and he shook his head and finally opened his eyes to looked down at her. She had a big smile on her face but he knew she was still tired. "Come on I have to go get Gwen in a few hours and Adrian will be home soon." She sighed as Dean finally let her go and she sat up. She climbed over him gently and when she stood up she grabbed his arms and nearly dragged him off the couch. She laughed when he didn't move. "Don't make this harder than it already is." She yanked one more time and he finally sat up.

Dean rubbed his eyes as he sat up. He watched Clara walked around the table and throw him his boxers and jeans. He pulled them both on under the blanket and when he finally stood up Clara walked over and took his hand. They both headed toward the stairs and they both sighed. When they reached the bedroom Dean wanted nothing more than to just flop onto the bed and sleep all day.

Clara turned to Dean, placed a kiss on his cheek and walked over to the bed. She nearly ripped the covers off the bed as she tried to undo the tucked corners. She jumped into the sheet and pulled the blankets back over her head. He smirked as she exhaled loudly and the covers settled over her shape.

Dean turned and headed for the bathroom. He was hesitant to start the shower but once the hot water hit his skin he felt better. Once he found his way into clean clothes he headed downstairs to find Adrian sitting at the table on the phone.

"It's like 5 in the morning... Who are you talking to?" Dean laughed and Adrian ignored him for a minute.

"Alright, I'll see you later tonight doll." Adrian smirked and then hung up the phone.

"Doll?" Dean laughed as he started to make some coffee.

"What she likes it?" Adrian shrugged as he rubbed his eyes.

"She?" Dean asked trying to get more information out of him.

"That was my date tonight." He smirked proudly. "Jamie, she came into the store just as I was leaving and thought I was good looking." Adrian smiled as he got up and got some orange juice. "I asked for her number and I just asked her out."

"Well good for you." Dean smirked as he drank his coffee.

"I know this is probably a stupid question... but I was wondering if there is anyway I could borrow your car." Adrian sighed already knowing the answer. Dean just stared at him. "You know what... never mind. Mine is fine.. forget I said anything." He smiled not really surprised Dean said nothing. Dean sighed. "I'm gonna go to bed... I'll see you later." He winked over at Dean.

"Just don't get that girl into any trouble." Dean joked as Adrian smiled at him. He shook his head at the kid at her walked up the stairs. He knew Clara wasn't going to like hearing about his date.

As Dean made his way outside he noticed how dark it still was. The sun was never out when he headed off to work but it was darker than usual. Then the rain started and he understood why. He jumped into his truck and headed down the street.

* * *

Work was the same as the day before. Long, tiring, and he spent most of his day looking over his shoulder. He would get distracted easily every time something fell. Zoe must have checked up on him a dozen times during the day and every time she tired to get his mind off of what was bothering him. By 5 o'clock he had enough of work. He sighed as punched out and was hoping to get home early.

"Headed home?" Zoe stopped him just as he was sneaking past her desk. She smiled brightly at him and waited.

"Yea... it's friday and I promised Clara I would spend sometime with Gwen." Dean smiled kindly.

"Aw that's sweet." She smiled as she walked around the desk grabbing her purse. "You know I envy you a little." She sighed.

"Envy?" He laughed as they both walked out of the shop. "Why the hell would you envy someone like me?" Dean was confused.

"Come on Dean... You got _the_ life." She sighed. "A nice house, wife and kids... _and_ they don't hate you." She chuckled a bit. "It's what everyone wants."

"Well I'll tell you this... it wasn't easy to get." He offered and she looked up at him. "We both had to work really hard to get this far... I mean we both gave up a lot." Dean shrugged.

"But I bet you don't regret it." She smiled up at him. Dean shook his head. "Clara is a very lucky women." Zoe smiled placing her hand on his arm and sliding it down slowly.

"Pretty sure I'm the lucky one." He smirked and she smiled.

"Well have a good weekend." She nodded and then made her way to her car.

It was a quiet drive. Dean made his way home quickly and only stopped at one light hat had just turned red. He looked around seeing something out of place. Claw marks again. He pulled over right away and rushed across the street to investigate. The marks were just like the one he found in the abandoned house last night. He looked up and down the street realizing how close these two were from his family.

"_Shit._" He swore as he pulled out his phone and quickly dialled Clara's number. When she didn't answer he rushed back to his truck. He thought about leaving a message but didn't bother. He slammed on the gas and peeled away from the curb. He raced up the street, no doubt leaving acceleration marks along the way.

When he noticed Clara's car missing from the driveway he exhaled with relief, but Adrian's was still parked on the side of the road. He walked up to the door noticing it was still lock. He ran around to the garage and made his way to his car. It was only when he started to hear things again that made him really start to question what was happening to him.

"Hiya Dean..." A voice made his blood run cold. He turned quickly, his vision fuzzy but he knew who he saw.

"You can't be..." He stuttered at Azazel's yellow eyes glaring at him.

"Oh sure I can." He winked. "I mean the big Daddy brought your pal Cas back... So why not me!" He laughed as Dean stared at him full of fear and confusion. "I'm so happy to see you... although I was surprised to see who you settled down with." his smiled grew. "I can't wait to say hello to Clara. I've missed her."

"Son of a-" Dean mumbled and tried to jump at him. He missed and Azazel took a hold of Dean's shoulders and smashed his back against the car.

"Really?" Azazel shook his head. "You know you got a great life... hell of a women, and two kids." He smirked wrapping a hand around Dean's neck. "Now did you really think you were gonna be able to keep them?" Dean started to choke as Azazel's grip got tighter and tighter. "You can't out run your past."His words started to fade as Dean started to lose his ability to breathe. He tried to fight against the grip but was failing. Soon the world started to go black.

Azazel's hand around Dean's neck was the last thing he remembered before everything went black. Soon he got his breath but only him whole body hurt. He was suddenly cold, and very uncomfortable. He opened his eyes slowly and for a second he could have sworn Azazel came back to kill him.

"Hi..." Dean was staring at a ghost as he slowly tried to sit up without his body pulsing in pain. He sat up before the other person, the ghost said anything. He let off a laugh as he stood. "I was expecting I don't know... A hug? Some holy water in the face? Something?" Sam smirked. Dean didn't believe he was looking at his brother.

"So I'm dead." Dean assumed right away. His voice broken as he groaned. "This is heaven? Yellow eyes killed me and-"

"Yellow eyes? That's what you saw?" Sam asked right away. Dean tilted his head. "Look you were poisoned. So whatever kinda crazy crap you think you've been seeing... it's not real." Sam sighed.

Dean was quiet for a moment. "So then... are you real?" He asked hoping for at least something that would make sense.

"I'm real." Sam smiled. He pulled out his knife and cut his arm, then walked over to the table behind him and drank some water that was no doubt holy. When he place the jug down, Dean just stared at him. "See." He smiled turning toward his brother.

Dean slowly stood up and looked at his brother. He wanted to smile, but he couldn't. "Sammy?"


	9. Chapter 8

It was dark and gloomy when Clara woke up around 8. The sky was grey and a few drops of rain fell every so often. She sighed as she pulled the covers off of her very warm spot. She got up slowly and nearly ran to the bathroom. The floor and the air was freezing. The hot shower was her savour.

When Clara dried the last drop of water from her hair she sat in front of her mirror for a good fifteen minutes. She didn't move, she just stared at herself. Her hair was a bouncy mess, she hadn't gotten around to putting make up on and for the first time she almost looked like herself.

There weren't any bags under her eyes. She didn't look worn out. Her body didn't ache from head to toe, and most of all she had a smile on. Not a forced or sad smile, but a real and authentic smile. She was happy.

As she waited for her straight iron to heat up she applied some mascara and a soft red to her lips. As she slowly ran the hot iron through her hair she caught herself humming. Once all her hair was straight and stayed in place she collected it in the middle and made sure the pony was tight. Her bangs swept across her forehead toward the left nicely and even noticed how light her hair was getting. It was dark brown for so long that she forgot how light it used to be. For the first time in a while that smile didn't fall.

She walked over to her closet and looked through her clothes. The usual black dress pants and blouses took over one side while the other side was full of 'hunter' attire. She smiled as she reached for her favourite pair of skinny jeans that she hadn't been able to fit in since she died. Clara shrugged as she undid the button and almost prayed for them to fit. She was feeling good inside, she wanted to feel good on the outside as well.

She only struggled for a minute but the zipper went up and when she opened her eyes and exhaled she was shocked. "They fit?" She had to say out loud as she twisted her back to look at the jeans from both sides. They were tight and form-fitting. She smiled as the rips caused a few flash backs. Nothing to traumatic, being thrown by a vamp, and slashed at by a Windego. "That's when it was simple." She reminded herself with a small smile.

Clara was going to change out of the jeans but the glimpse of the time out of the corner of her eye made her think again. She was running a bit late. For someone who didn't have a job sure had a lot of errands to get done during the day. First she had to get groceries, next was to pick up Gwen from Penelope's, and then it was pretty much up to Gwen what they did after that. For a little girl she sure did want to go a lot of places.

Clara quietly passed Adrian's room and noticed it was dark. He must have come home and fallen asleep quickly. She pulled her leather jacket on and grabbed her keys from the bowl. She made sure she had her phone in her pocket before leaving, and locking the door behind her.

It was around 12:30 when Clara finally made her way to Penelope and Derek's. She walked up the stairs quickly and knocked on the apartment door. She only had to wait a few seconds before the door flew open.

"Clara!" Penelope smiled and rushed forward and hugged her.

"Wooh... hi to you too." Clara laughed as she hugged her friend back.

"Come in!" Penelope was very loud and happy.

"Alright..." Clara said closing the door behind her. "What's going on?" She asked as she looked around the apartment and noticed how some toys were scattered around the floor. "Where's Gwen?" Clara asked quickly.

"Derek took her to the park about a half hour ago... they'll be back soon." Penelope smiled and then suddenly she looked nervous.

"Are you alright?" Clara tilted her head a bit.

"Yeah." She laughed nervously. "Wooh... I like your outfit." Penelope smiled quickly looking Clara up and down.

"Thanks... I haven't been able to fit into these jeans in a while." Clara smiled proudly.

"Well you look good." Penelope flashed a very big smile. "And..." She paused narrowing her eyes at Clara. "Wow..." She giggled as her face turned red.

"What?" Clara looked down quickly thinking something was wrong.

"Nothing you just..." Penelope's face was now burning red. "I think Derek and I should babysit more often." She winked at Clara and they both smirked.

"Well it's not like we get as much time together as you and Derek." Clara smirked. "He works a lot and when he gets home half the time he is already half asleep." Both women walked over and sat on the couch. "I mean I'm not complaining... I'm the one who quit my job and put all the pressure on him but... it's frustrating." Clara sighed.

"Frustrating?" Penelope laughed. "Well how often did you two... you know... before Gwen and Adrian?" Penelope asked a bit confused.

"Are you asking me how often we used to have sex?" Clara laughed at the shyness in Penelope's voice.

"What? I'm just curious." She shrugged. "You two only got together when he got back from Hell right... so that was what six years ago?" Penelope asked and Clara thought for a second then nodded. "And minus that one year he left." She sighed. "So that's like five years you two have been together... is it really all that different?" Penelope asked.

"Yes." Clara answered with a tilt of her head. "Before we didn't know if we would see each other again. When he got back we were both just alone and broken. Now we are... well not broken." Clara narrowed her eyes at her words. "If that makes sense." She shrugged.

"Did you ever think you would make it this far?" Penelope asked with a small smile. Suddenly this conversation was getting very deep and Clara smiled at that.

"I'll put it this way... seven years ago if you told me that one day I would be married to Dean Winchester, have a baby with him, and lead a normal life, I would have shot you in the head thinking you had gone insane." Clara laughed.

"Really?"

"No one ever thinks they'll make it this far." Clara added. "And if they do they usually turn into he things they used to hunt. The life changes you after a while." Clara sighed.

"Well I for one am very happy he got you pregnant." Penelope nudged Clara and both women laughed.

The sound of the doorknob turning slowly made Penelope jump off the couch. "Wooh!" Clara laughed at her friend's sudden movements. "What are you doing?" She asked as Penelope rushed over to the door and stopped Derek from walking in.

"Hey!" He yelled as the door hit him a bit as Penelope closed it on him.

"Aunty Penny!" Clara hear Gwen giggle. "Let us in!" She laughed.

"Yeah Aunty Penny... let them in." Clara shook her head. "What's going on with you?" Clara asked as she stepped forward toward the door.

"Wait." Penelope stopped her. "Before they come in you gotta make me a promise..."

"A promise?" Clara laughed.

"You have to promise not to get mad..." She sighed as her voice got low. When she opened the door slowly and Gwen came running in with Derek's hand in hers.

"Mommy!" Gwen giggled as she let go of Derek and ran toward Clara.

"Oh my god!" Clara nearly screamed as she bent over to pick up Gwen and noticed what Penelope was so nervous about. The right side of Gwen's face was scratched and the skin around her eye was turning a dark purple. "What the hell happened?" Clara looked at her daughter's face in shock.

"We are so sorry! She was running around... we were just playing tag and she fell..." Penelope panicked.

"She was very brave though... didn't cry or anything." Derek added not as nervous as Penelope.

"That's right!" Gwen smiled with a big nod. "It don't even hurt! Uncle Derek said I was the toughest ever!" She looked over proud of herself. "Ground hurts though." She sighed with a smile.

Clara couldn't hep but smile."Make sure to tell Daddy that." She whispered and Penelope sighed as Derek smiled. "You should be more careful." Clara said as she put Gwen down.

"But Adrian says that scars are cool." She pouted a bit as she looked up at Clara.

"Don't listen to your brother... he is an idiot." Clara smirked and Gwen laughed.

"I'm gonna tell him you said that!" She giggled as she ran away.

"He already knows he is!" Clara called after Gwen as she disappeared into one of the bedrooms. She looked over at Penelope and Derek crossing her arms.

"Oh god... she's mad!" Penelope freaked out right away. "I said sorry!"

"Penelope calm down." Clara laughed. "Kids get hurt... it's no one's fault if she fell."

"I told you." Derek nudged his wife and smiled.

"Well as long as she is in one piece right." Clara smiled. "Come on Gwen get your stuff! We have to get going." Clara sighed.

"Why?" Penelope asked.

"Adrian has a date and I wanna question the girl." Clara smiled proudly.

"Oh come on! Isn't that only supposed to be the guy." Derek asked. "You are gonna stress that poor girl out."

"Well I can't just let him run around with anyone... that's how kids get in trouble."

"Oh god he is 19. You need to trust him a little more than that." Penelope laughed.

"Are you kidding..." Clara laughed and Derek smirked. "He is _19!_ He is the definition of trouble."

"He's smart... plus I think he knows best not to screw up." Derek added.

"If I was him I wouldn't wanna tell you or Dean anything I did wrong." Penelope laughed. "That poor kid."

"Hey! We aren't that scary." Clara laughed.

"You obviously have never seen yourself get angry..." Penelope said as Gwen came running out of a bedroom with her bag dragging on the floor.

"True." Clara smiled as she took the bag from Gwen. "Well you ready?" She asked looking at the girl.

"Yupp." she smiled up at Clara.

"Well what do you say then?" Clara said tilting her head.

"Thank you Aunty Penny and Uncle Derek!" She laughed and jumped to hug each one of them

"Bye tough girl." Derek laughed as Gwen hugged him tightly.

"Byeeee!" Gwen called out as they left.

* * *

"Clara for the love of God stop!" Adrian yelled from behind his bedroom door. She had been standing outside for about an hour asking questions. "It's one date... it's not like I'm getting married!" He laughed.

"Well I know that! What I can't ask questions."

"Yea but not 25!" He laughed.

"24 actually." She corrected him and she heard him exhale.

"Whatever! Can you just stop." He sighed as he finally opened his door.

Clara smirked as she looked at him. "Aw you really like this girl don't you?" She asked.

"No I don't... shut up." She watched as he blushed a bit. She laughed.

"You even put on a tie!" She giggled a bit.

"Oh what are you fifteen?" he asked shaking his head at her.

"Shut up." she snapped back at him with a smile as she fixed the pale blue tie he had on. "Just don't be jerk." She winked as Adrian batted her hands away.

He huffed and rolled his eyes. They both walked down the stairs and Gwen met them at the bottom. She had been watching TV for about an hour with one of her stuffed animals. She ran over and stared up at Adrian.

"What?" he asked as she stood in his way and he looked down at her.

"You handsome." She smiled and threw her arms up so he would pick her up.

"Aww..." Clara sighed as Adrian picked up his sister with a laugh.

"Well thank you." Adrian smiled as he kissed her cheek. "What are you two gonna do?" He looked back at Clara as he walked into the living room and sat Gwen back down on the couch ad sat next to her.

"Well whenever Dean comes home we'll probably eat." Clara shrugged as she sat with them.

"Is he still at work?" Adrian asked looking at his phone and the time.

"I guess... Busy I guess." Clara sighed as she sat back. "You should probably get going, don't wanna be late." She winked over at Adrian and he rolled his eyes.

"Yeah yeah." he sighed as he got up. "I'll be back later." He smirked.

"Keep your phone on." Clara called out as he left.

"Alright!" He yelled and Clara and Gwen were left sitting on the couch watching TV.

"No what?" Gwen looked over and sighed.

"I don't know... what now?" Clara smiled.

"I'm hungry." Gwen said with a small sigh.

Clara looked over her shoulder at the clock in the kitchen and sighed. "Well I guess your father won't be joining us till later." Clara sighed. "Alright what do you want?"

"Sgetti!" Gwen giggled.

"Spaghetti is is." Clara nodded as she got up and headed to the kitchen. Gwen continued to watch TV and Clara looked for her phone. "Dean, where are you?" She started to leave a message when he didn't answer. "You know if your not gonna be home for dinner you should really call... just call me back." Clara sighed. He usually called if he was going to be late.

* * *

"But I don't wanna sleep." Gwen whined once Clara placed her in her bed. "I wanna wait for daddy!" She said with big eyes.

"Well Daddy isn't coming home till later, and you need to go to bed." Clara said pulling the covers over her.

"but..." Gwen said quietly as her eyes started to water.

"No crying." Clara said sitting straight and Gwen sighed. "You'll see him in the morning." Clara smiled trying to make the girl feel better.

"Okay..." She sighed clutching her stuffed animal tightly.

Clara smiled and leaned over and kissed her daughter on the forehead. When she sat back up she heard the front door open quickly. "Clara!" She heard Adrian yell. Gwen sat up quickly jumping close to her mother. They both heard the slight panic in his voice.

"Here." Clara called as Adrian ran up the stairs and into the doorway. His face was a bit pale and he was out of breath. "What's wrong?" Clara asked as Gwen held onto her side.

"There is some guy in a car just outside..." he heaved out. "He's watching the house."

"He look familiar?" Clara asked.

"No... and there is something else." He said walking in and closing the door. "Someone was snaking around the back when I pulled in."

"Did you get a good look at him?" Clara asked switching into protective mode.

"No... but his arms... they were glowing." Adrian said walking over and sat next to Clara.

"I want you to take Gwen and lock your selves in our closet." Clara said as Gwen climbed across her lap and crawled into her brother's arms. "Do not come out unless I come get you." She said getting up quickly.

"Mommy..." Gwen started in a scared tone.

"Sh..." Clara smiled over at her. "Nothing to be afraid of. You just stay with your brother and be really quiet okay?" She asked and Gwen rubbed her eyes. "Like hide and seek... okay? Can you do that for me?" Clara asked and Gwen nodded. "Okay... get up." She looked to Adrian who took a tight hold of Gwen and followed Clara to the door.

Clara took a deep breath as she opened the door and tried to steady her hand. She opened it slowly and peered around the corners. The lights were still on and she couldn't hear anything. She gestured for Adrian to go around her and they both ran to her bedroom.

"Don't come out no matter what. Not until I come get you." She ordered again as she pushed Adrian toward the closet. "It locks from the inside, so stay in the corner." She explained and Adrian nodded. "Take this with you..." she said as he put Gwen down and she ran to the corner of the closet. Clara turned and walked over Dean's side of the bed. She reach up and pulled out a duffel. "Only use it if you have to." She ordered again as she pulled out a gun and placed it in his hands.

"Okay." Adrian took hold of it and nodded. He turned and walked into the closet and Clara waited to hear the lock clip.

"Okay." She said to herself once the door locked. She grabbed her gun from the nightstand and a silver knife from the bag. She took a deep breath as she left the room. She closed the door behind her as she made her way through the top level of the house clearing each room. She closed each door once she was sure no one was inside.

She slowly made her way down the stairs and just as she saw the front door the lights were taken out. She ran to the kitchen and fished the flashlight out of on of the drawers. She paused when she heard someone at the front door. She dropped the flashlight and decided she would handle this in the dark like the intruder wanted. The light would give her away.

She released the safety on her gun and walked toward the door. She watched from around the corner. The door opened slowly and a dark blue light lit up the bottom of the door way. She took a deep breath as she watched the man walk in. She knew what he was the minute he walked in. The blue light tattoos gave him away.

She waited for a minute as he walked in slowly. He left the door wide open and she quietly followed his movements as he made his way toward the living room. Once his back was turned she took her chance. She jumped onto his back making him fall against the couch then roll over her onto the glass coffee table.

They both struggled on top of the table but soon their weight was too much. He had managed to get on top of her and as he was struggling to point a needle to her neck the table gave in and the glass shattered.

Clara had lost her gun in the struggle and some glass had found its way into her sides. She huffed in pain as she reached for her knife. The man punched her in the face and she quickly sliced his other arm as he tried to inject her again. The needle dropped and Clara kicked it away. She had no idea what was in it but she knew it was best to stay away.

"Who are you!" She tried to yell as she stood slowly as he hissed at the burning on his arm from her cut.

"I think you know." He smiled.

"What do you want?" She asked trying to slash him again.

He laughed and stood quickly and dodged her swipe. "Revenge." She shrugged. He smiled and jumped at her. She saw this coming and took her chance to plunge her knife into his chest. He stumbled back a bit and she bent down grabbing the metal leg of the smashed table and hit him across the face making him crumble to the ground.

She watched as he tried to reach for the needle and she rushed over stepping on it to crush it. He grabbed her ankle and pulled her off her feet. She crashed to the ground hitting her head hard against the mantel.

Clara's head was beating as her eyes slowly closed. She watched as the man stood with all his strength and instead of killing her he kicked her across the face knocking her out completely. She assumed he ran because all she heard was footsteps getting further.

Clara wasn't knocked out for long. When she came too she could taste blood in her mouth and her head was ringing. She sat up quickly and looked around. The living room was a mess but everything seemed calm. She stood slowly and walked into the kitchen, spitting her mouth full of blood into the sink.

She was going to get Adrian and Gwen but she decided to look around the house first. No one was around and she sighed. She caught a small glimpse of her self in a mirror and she had to look back. The mirror was near the door which was still open. The car across the street looked empty now so she ignored it.

"Jesus." She sighed as she looked at her injuries. Her sides were scraped with glass and blood, but her face was worse. The left side of her temple was still bleeding from whacking her head against the mantel. The cut was long but not deep. Her right eye was dark and her bottom lip was bleeding. She shook her head and turned to walk up stairs but she heard tires screeching up the street and into the drive way and it stopped her. She ran into the living room and grabbed the metal leg and hid against the wall that separated the entrance from the living room and waited for someone to come in. If that Djinn wanted more she was going to make sure to kill him this time.


	10. Chapter 9

"You need to take me home right now." Dean ordered and Sam sighed deeply.

Way to much had hit Dean in the last couple hours and he had a million questions but he had one job. he had to keep his family safe. They had just figure out that a group of Djinn had been poising both Sam and Dean in order to kill them. And Sam couldn't drive fast enough.

When Dean saw the door wide open his heart dropped and he bolted. "Clara!" He called out in a deep and frightened voice. Sam followed his brother keeping his distance. Dean jumped through the door way and he was greeted with silence and then a piece of metal being aimed at his head. "Wooh!" He ducked quickly.

The metal leg hit the wall, leaving a dent and when Dean looked up he noticed he was a bit late. "Dean?" She questioned and dropped the metal to the ground.

"Clara." He smiled pulling her into him quickly and squeezing her tightly.

"Where the hell have you been!" She wanted to yell as she hugged him tightly.

"I'm sorry... but uh..." Dean sighed and he felt Clara's arms drop from her hug before he finished.

"No." She pushed away from Dean. "You can't be here." He looked up and she was looking past him. "Sam?" She questioned with fear in her eyes.

"Hi Clara." he stood in the door way. "Are you alright?" he asked as he stepped into the house and she stepped back.

"No, I'm not." She answered honestly. "I've been attacked and now I'm seeing dead people." She growled. He just stared at her. She was playing it well. Part of her surprise was real, he said he would stay away.

Sam sighed as he looked down. "Clara... where is Adrian and Gwen?" Dean tried to switch the focus.

"In our closet." She said not looking at him. "I'll go get them. We can't stay here." She said backing up.

"Agreed. We should get you guys to Bobby's." Sam answered and Clara narrowed her eyes at him. She couldn't believe she was seeing him. He had made it very clear he was going to stay away from them. Why was he back?

Clara was half way up the stairs when she noticed Dean following her. "What the hell is he doing here?" She whispered.

"Long story...I'll explain at Bobby's." Dean sighed and followed her into their room.

"Adrian... It's me. Open up." She said knocking on the closet door. "Adrian." Clara called out with anger.

"Clara..." Dean looked over at her. He could tell she was pissed and still beat up but she didn't need to be so pushy.

"Hold on!" Adrian huffed as he unlocked the door. He opened the door and Gwen was already in his arms. She was clinging to him tightly and sobbing. "Hard to get up when she is a mess." Adrian smirked. "Oh hey Dean." He nodded to Dean.

"You alright kid?" Dean smiled as he looked him over.

"Yeah fine." He nodded. "She isn't though." He sighed. "Gwen?" Adrian said quietly as he rubbed her back.

"Is Mommy back yet?" She asked with a sob.

"I'm right here sweetheart." Clara sighed and Gwen turned her head and looked at her.

"Mommy!" She shrieked and nearly jumped from Adrian's arms.

"Shhh, your alright." Clara smiled as she hugged her daughter.

"I did good right? I was quiet and didn't make a sound." Gwen looked up at Clara.

"Very brave." Dean smiled.

"Daddy!" She shrieked every louder and reached out for him. "Your back!" She giggled as Dean took her form Clara.

"Yeah I'm back..." He sighed closing his eyes as he held his daughter tightly. When Gwen looked up at him. "What happened to your face?" He freaked out a bit.

"Unrelated." Clara answered quickly. "Look we have to go..." She looked to Adrian. "Go pack some clothes for you and Gwen and be ready in ten." She said rushing into the closet and grabbed a handful of jeans and t-shirts. "Gwen go with Adrian." Clara looked over to Dean who was just smiling as he held Gwen.

"Can't I stay with Daddy?" She pouted.

"I'll just come help you." Dean smiled down and shot Clara a bit of an irritated look.

"I know..." She said walking over to him with a sad smile. She knew what he was getting irritated at. She was switching into hunter mode to fast to care how she sounded. "I'm sorry." She smiled kissing both Dean and Gwen on the cheek. "But we do have to leave." She sighed and turned back to stuffing clothes in a bag.

Clara watched from the corner of her eye as Dean left the room with Adrian and Gwen. Once they were gone she stopped what she was doing and leaned forward on the bed, only her hands keeping her up. She took a deep breath.

"If it's any consolation, I tried to handle this myself..." Sam's voice came from her doorway and she looked up quickly. "I did try and keep you out of this." He said but she said nothing, just went back to packing. "Clara?" he tried to get her to look at him, but she pretended like she didn't see him. "What are you mad at me?" he laughed. "I stayed away for four years and your pissed that you weren't prepared for an attack." He laughed again. "You had to have seen this coming." He raised his voice a bit. She glared up at him and then continued to pack. "Clara. I left you alone for four years and this is the thanks I get?" He started to get angry as he walked into the room.

"Lower your voice." She hissed.

"Or what?" he shook his head.

"I'll send you back to wherever you came from." She hissed again. "Its been hard enough keeping your secret, I don't need Dean finding out." She said through her teeth. "Now... shut up and get out of my house." She huffed as she grabbed her bag and headed for the door.

Dean was waiting at the door with Gwen in his arms. He had a small smile on his face while Adrian brought the bags to the car. "You good?" He asked as Clara came stomping down the stairs.

"Yeah." She smiled as Sam followed her. "Let's get out of here before more come." She sighed looking up at Gwen who held on tight to Dean.

"Where are we going?" Gwen sighed with a yawn.

"We are going to see Grandpa." Clara smiled.

"Really!" She shrieked a bit. "Yaay!" She giggled.

* * *

"Are you going to tell me how Sam is driving that car in front of us?" Adrian asked as Clara drove close behind Sam and Dean. Clara took a deep breath as she kept both hands on the wheel. "Are you gonna keep me in the dark?" He laughed. "Come on... what? Dean sell his soul again? Or is Sam... not Sam?" Adrian asked staring at Clara.

"Why do you always ask so many questions." She sighed as she looked in her mirror to see Gwen fast asleep in her car seat.

"Because I deserve to know." Adrian huffed. "Especially if it means if we are in danger."

"We aren't in danger." She corrected him. "Sam is Sam." She shrugged. "He is human."

"You know for sure?" He asks and Clara nodded. "Okay then how did he get back?" He asked with confusion. "I mean he jumped into Lucifer's cage... can't find a harder place to climb out of than that." He chuckled a bit.

"He didn't fill me in on the details... but he's been back longer then just today." She sighed.

"What!" Adrian almost yelled.

"Shhh!" Clara hushed him as they both looked back to make sure Gwen was still asleep.

"He was alive and didn't tell Dean?" Adrian was confused. "ouch..." Adrian sighed. "That must have pissed Dean off..."

"I'm sure Sam had his reasons..." Clara tried to defend herself along with Sam. She was just as guilty.

"That must be one really good reason... I mean to not tell your brother that your alive... that's just cruel." Adrian sighed.

Clara could feel the guilt rise in her as she listened to Adrian. The rest of the drive was quiet. It was a long drive to Bobby's and Clara just tried to keep her mind off the massive lie she would have to try to keep hidden now that Sam was back. Adrian had fallen asleep within a few hours and it was quiet. Clara kept her eyes on the road but her heart was beating a millions times a minute. She was afraid. Afraid Dean would find out what she hid from him. She hated herself for lying, he would defiantly hate her. That cause her to exhale with pain in her heart.


	11. Chapter 10

The loud knock at Bobby's door weighed heavily on both Dean and Clara. Gwen was holding onto Dean tightly her eyes half-open and Adrian was next to Clara, helping her with the bags. The door didn't open right away and Clara sighed. Sam stayed by the car, Clara had given him an icy look when he tried to step up behind her so he stayed back.

The sun had only been up for a couple of hours and when Bobby finally answered the door the sun shone through the dark house. "Oh no..." He sighed when he saw them. "If you're all here... it can't be good." he sighed.

"Papa!" Gwen said in the middle of a yawn.

"Hey sweetheart." He said letting Dean in first and taking the girl from him. She was tired but hugged him tightly anyways.

"We have a problem." Dean sighed as he walked into the house and stopped in the living room.

"What kind of problem?" Bobby asked as he followed Dean with Gwen still in his arms.

"Adrian, Take Gwen upstairs." Clara spoke before Dean could answer Bobby's question.

"I wanna stay with Papa and Daddy." She complained.

"Why don't you get some more sleep, and when you wake up they'll be here." Clara smiled at her daughter.

"Alright..." She sighed. "Night Papa..." She said placing a quick kiss on his cheek. "Night Daddy." She yawned as she turned her head to face Dean. He smiled and walked over so she could kiss his cheek too.

"Come on Gwen." Adrian said softly as he took her from Bobby. She climbed onto his back and giggled a bit at the piggyback ride she got up the stairs.

Dean, Clara, and Bobby stood watching the two walk up the stairs. Once they were gone it was quiet again and they all looked at each other. Bobby just waited for his answer. Soon he got his answer. Sam had taken the silence as a good time to walk into the house. He stood in the doorway of the living room with his hands in his pockets.

Dean looked up and passed Clara to look at his brother. Once she realized he was behind her she moved and walked over to Dean's side. He sighed as he noticed her uneasiness and she looked up at him with a small smile. Bobby looked behind him to see what they were uneasy about and sighed when he saw Sam.

"Hi Bobby." Sam smiled and Bobby sighed.

"Sam." He nodded as he walked in and stood next to him.

"Oh you have got to be kidding me." Clara laughed right away at Bobby's attitude toward Sam. Dean looked down at Clara a bit confused. "He knew..." She shook her head.

"You knew Sam was alive?" Dean snapped right away.

"Dean..." Sam tried to stop him.

"You knew and you didn't tell me?" Dean's voice cracked a bit. You could tell he was betrayed just by how he looked at Bobby. Clara couldn't bare to look at Dean, she couldn't handle that look. "What the hell!" Dean raised his voice.

Bobby looked up at Dean and got angry quickly. "You got out Dean." he said looking at Clara who kept her head down. "You got a life that didn't involve having your gut ripped out at the age of 30!" He raised his voice. "And I was grateful and I sure as hell wasn't going to ruin the family you both worked so hard to get." he said. "So deal with it!"

"Bobby, you didn't tell me my brother was alive! He is my family!" Dean snapped back.

"And if I told you what would have done?" He asked and sighed as he watched Clara step away from Dean. "You would have gotten into your car and drove away. You would have dove right back into the life and that would leave her alone."

"Not exactly alone..." She said to herself.

"I wouldn't have done that." Dean said slowly.

Clara looked up right away. "Liar." She accused him right away. He looked at her with confusion. "That's exactly what you would have done, whether I was pregnant or not." She shook her head. He looked down at her with pain in his eyes, what she said hurt him.

"That's not true." he said again.

"Dean... Stop." She ordered. She knew he was lying, it didn't surprise her nor did it hurt her. She knew exactly what he would have done and that is why she lied to him. She sighed and turned her back.

"Clara..." He said trying to follow her out of the living room.

"No." She stopped him. "I have to check on Gwen and Adrian..." She paused at the bottom of the stairs. "You three argue some more and when you want to deal with the Djinn who want to kill us, I'll be upstairs." She turned her back quickly and walked up the stairs. She wasn't mad at Dean, she just couldn't stand around listening to them argue and hear the hurt in his voice anymore.

* * *

She went into the first room that had a dim light, it used to be her room. She smiled as she opened the door slowly. Gwen was cuddled tight to Adrian's side as he sat up looking through a book. She leaned against the door frame and sighed. "Everything okay down there?" Adrian whispered but didn't look up from the book.

"They are working it out." She shrugged. "You should get some sleep." She said.

"Okay..." he sighed and looked over to her. "Clara?" He questioned before she could leave.

"Yeah?" She hummed.

"Are you alright? You don't look good." He sighed.

"Well I think the Djinn might have to take the blame for that." She laughed. "But I'm okay... tired but okay." She smiled and closed the door as she turned.

Clara sighed as she walked down the hall past Sam's old room. She huffed and didn't even look in. She walked to the end of the hall and walked into Dean's room. She sighed at how empty it was but the bed looked comfortable. She left the door open and nearly jumped into the bed.

She groaned at its stiffness. She suddenly realized that Dean never spent time in this room. He spent his nights in her room when they stayed at Bobby's as kids. She smirked and sighed as she laid her head on the pillow. Her eyes wanted to close but her mind was racing. Seeing Sam made her paranoid and she had to wait and see if he came up or not.

"Clara?" his soft whisper came from beside her. She had fallen asleep while she waited. She opened her eyes slowly but they closed because she didn't see who was next to her. "Clara..." he tried to shake her.

"Dean..." She sighed happily when she finally opened her eyes. She sat up slowly and took a deep breath. "Look I gotta talk to you." She sighed looking down as she placed a hand on his.

"Wait..." He paused as he lifted his hand and placed it on her cheek. He smirked and leaned forward. He placed his lips on her gently but it was a desperate kiss. When they finally separated his forehead rested on hers, his eyes were closed and his face was troubled. He sighed deeply.

"What was that for." She smiled trying to look up at him but he wouldn't open his eyes. He was quiet for a few minutes as he breathed in slowly. He held Clara's face and didn't want to let go. "Dean?" She said a bit softer and his eyes opened and he smiled.

"I almost lost you all today." he huffed quietly.

"But you didn't." She said taking his hand away from her face and lifting his chin to look at her. "See... still here." She smiled. Dean stared at her with the most painful expression. He leaned forward again and kissed her again. When he pulled away Clara sighed. "So what's the plan?" She asked trying to make him forget what she wanted to tell him.

He exhaled deeply and looked down at her hands which he was holding tightly. "Sam and I are going to go back and deal with it." He said quickly.

"Then I'm coming with." She added.

"No." he looked up and answered quickly. "You gotta stay here with Gwen and Adrian."

"Dean that wasn't a question, I'm not letting you go anywhere with him..." She said.

"Clara I checked... it's Sam, like human and everything."

"Don't care, don't trust him." She answered quickly. He tilted his head and narrowed his eyes.

"Well I have to." Dean said firmly. "And you already fought off your share of Djinn today... so just stay here please." he sighed and looked at her as she stared at his hands.

"It's not like I lost." She whined a bit.

"What?" He asked a bit confused by her attitude.

"It's not like I lost the fight... I was ready and I was winning." She said looking up. "He ran from me." She smiled proudly.

"Well to be fair I don't think he was there for you." Dean added.

"Wow..." She huffed. "I kicked his ass and you're defending him." She shook her head with a smirk.

"I'm not defending him." He snapped quickly.

"I know..." Clara's voice lowered. "I was joking..." She tilted her head and noticed the anger in Dean's voice. "Look I know it's been a weird day...very weird but come on lighten up a bit." She sighed.

"How am I supposed to lighten up?" He narrowed his eyes. "My family is attacked and my brother has been alive for years and didn't tell me." He huffed as he stood quickly and started to pace.

"Like I said... weird day." She watched him walk back and forth. It was quiet for a second and she took a deep breath. "How mad at Bobby are you?" She asked looking down at the floor as she slid to the edge of the bed.

"What?" He stopped.

"Bobby... how mad are you that he didn't tell you about Sam?" She asked. She had to know, if it would be the same for her. Dean said nothing and just stared at Clara, he was confused. Why did she care?

"Dose it matter?" He huffed looking down at her.

"Guess not." She looked up with a smile, she couldn't do it. "When are we leaving?" She asked with a small smile.

"Sam and I are leaving within the hour." He stood tall as she stood up in front of him. "You are staying here." He nearly ordered.

By the look on his face Clara could tell he was pissed at the world, but she needed to go with him. "But-" She started and then stopped. "Fine." She sighed and tilted her head. "Just promise me you will watch your back... I don't trust him."

Dean smirked and shook his head. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her shoulders and hugged her tightly. She smiled as she put her arms around him quickly and didn't want to let him go. He placed a soft kiss on the top of her head and let go first. He gave her one last reassuring smile then turned and left the room.

Clara sat on the bed for the next hour or so and when she heard someone downstairs she got up quickly. She headed down the stairs and smiled when she saw Bobby sitting in the dimly light kitchen. It was still light out but somehow that kitchen never got good light. She walked in and sat across from him at the table.

He had a bottle of whiskey next to him and two glasses. He must have known she was going to come down eventually. He sighed and poured each glass half way. He slid one glass over to Clara and she took it. He didn't look at her as he took the first drink.

"Why didn't you say anything?" She asked quickly and he looked at her.

"You know damn well why." He huffed and she nodded.

She took a small drink and placed the glass down slowly. "Thank you." She smiled her eyes tearing up a bit. He looked up at her quickly a bit in shock. He saw the tears in her eyes and he sighed. "I know it was a hard decision but I'm thankful you didn't say anything." She smiled through one of the tears that tried to fall but didn't.

"I couldn't be the reason you're life fell apart." He sighed. "Care about you two idgits too much." He smirked. Clara lowered her head a bit putting her hands up and rubbed her sore face. Bobby watched as the pained look on her face turned to pure guilt. "How long did you know?" He asked and she looked up quickly with a gasp.

"Bout a year after... the day we got married." She tried not to talk to loud. "He walked in and I didn't know what to do. He told me not to tell anyone because he wouldn't stick around nor would he come back." She started to get angry. "I wanted to tell Dean so many times, hell I almost did a few day after but I couldn't. The words wouldn't come back." She said and shook her head. "What was I supposed to say?" She cried a bit but her tears didn't fall. Bobby sighed and looked down. He felt the guilt. Clara shook her head and took a quickly drink.

"The truth." Dean's low and very hurt voice came from behind her. She froze mid swallow. She nearly choked as she looked up and around quickly with wide eyes. She prayed he wasn't standing there, but sure enough he was. Arms dropped to the side, fists balled, and betrayal in his eyes. "You..." he started and stopped as his voice crack.

"Dean..." She said softly as she stood slowly, her knees wanted to buckle. She tried to take a step forward but he threw his hand up and stopped her.

"You...You knew... this whole time and you..." He couldn't finish the sentence.

"I wanted to... I just couldn't." The tears were really close to falling. She tried not to sound to needy because then it made her look more guilty. "I tried so any times..." She was failing at not begging.

"Then why didn't you!" Dean yelled with a snap of his head. He stared at her and she jumped. He never yelled at her.

"Because I couldn't!" She yelled back. "Don't you see... if I would have told you, you would have jumped back in the Impala and drove away!" Her voice was still loud. "It was selfish and I've had to live with it for four years but I did what was best for the both of us!"

"What's _best_?" He mocked her a bit. She was about to open her mouth but he stopped her. "No." He said in a demanding voice. "You had no right to keep that from me." He said in a low and scary tone. He was pissed.

"No right?" She couldn't help but get mad. "As your wife and mother of your daughter I think I had every right." She said and he looked up at her with wide angry eyes.

"Really?" he laughed. "Cause all I see is a liar." he spat at her.

"Dean!" Bobby barked at him and Dean just shook his head.

Dean huffed and turned his back quickly. Clara watched as he stormed out of the house while Sam walked into the kitchen. He looked confused while everyone was angry. "Get out." She ordered. "Go kill the Djinn." She ordered and Sam just huffed. He never liked being told what to do by it was worse now. He turned and followed his brother.

The sound of tires squealing out of the drive made Clara flinch. She sighed and hung her head. "You think he'll come back?" She asked before she turned to face Bobby.

"He's pretty pissed... but I'm sure he will." Bobby tried to sound believable. Clara looked up at him with a huff. She knew he was telling her what she wanted to hear. He huffed and walked over to her and hugged her tightly. "Truth is I have no idea... but I doubt he will be mad forever."

"Gez... thanks." Clara had t laugh as she hugged Bobby tightly. "Alright." She let go and kissed his cheek lightly.

"Where you going?" He asked.

"I'm gonna get some sleep then I am going to follow them." She sad walking out of the kitchen.

"You think it's smart to go after them?" Bobby asked.

"Yes. The kids will stay here with you until I come back. I can't risk trusting Sam right now." She sighed.

"Clara what's it gonna take to get you to believe it's really him?" Bobby asked.

"I have no idea but... until I have actual proof then I'm not leaving Dean alone with him." Clara sighed as she made her way up the stairs. "You're good with watching Adrian and Gwen right?" Clara smiled back.

"Of course... just be careful with those two."


	12. Chapter 11

Dean's head was sealing with questions the whole time they were on the road. He had never been so mad in his life. Clara had known this whole time and never said anything. He always thought she would never lie to him. Hell they made vows never to lie to one another. He started to question everything she had said to him the whole time they were together. Was she always a liar? Could he even trust her now?

"Dean?" Sam snapped him out of his daze. Dean was now standing in his kitchen with his arms crossed and his back was leaned against the counter. He blinked and looked up at Sam. The sun was still up and they had only been at the house for an hour.

"What?" Dean barked and stared at Sam.

"They're here." Sam said, and just as he turned his back the front door opened.

"Boys?" Samuel's voice traveled quickly. His voice made Dean's spin shiver.

"Yea." Sam called back and Samuel walked in and nodded to Dean. Dean didn't move.

"I still think this is a dumb plan." Samuel huffed.

"Only one that makes sense." Sam huffed. "Dean was right, those Djinn wanted us. Might as well give them some bait." Sam smirked and Dean looked back down at the floor.

"Which means they are out there watching us." Samuel pointed out.

"Exactly. Which is why you need to leave." Dean finally spoke. "They won't come if you and the others are still here." Dean said walking away and into the living room. He looked around at his cousins that were looking at the stuff on the walls and on the floor. All Dean could see was the smashed coffee table.

"Cute little family you got here Winchester." One of his cousins, Christian smirked as he lifted a photo from the mantel. Dean huffed. Christian was holding the only picture of all four of them, taken about two years ago. Dean took the photo forcefully and put it back.

"Do you mind." he huffed.

"Aw look you kept the baby shoes." His other cousin, Gwen spoke up and Dean rolled his eyes.

"Could you not touch that." Dean barked at her as she lifted the large frame that held Gwen's little pink shoes.

"What did you name the little munchkin." She rolled her eyes as she looked over at a picture of the girl.

"Gwen actually." Dean huffed. "And I'm starting to think about a name change." He huffed again.

"Alright enough." Samuel came from the other room. "Everyone out. I need to talk to Dean." He ordered.

"We'll be in the van... when it gets dark we should head around the block." Gwen sighed as she nodded to Samuel and Dean.

"Good." Samuel nodded back as she and Christian left.

"You should leave to." Dean started.

"Not yet." Samuel said. "Look Dean we need to talk about this..." Samuel sighed as he looked around the living room.

"About what?" Dean asked crossing his arms with a sigh.

"This." Samuel threw his arms up gesturing to the house. "I mean it's a nice house but you know we need you now right?" Samuel said looking at Dean. "I mean this is a sign."

"A sign of what exactly?" Dean was confused.

"That it's time to join us." Samuel stood tall. "Has Sam not filled you in on what we have been dealing with for the past few years?" He narrowed his eyes and Dean shrugged. "It's Hell... literally. I mean there are things out there I haven't even heard of before." He let off a sad chuckle. "It's all hands on deck."

"Then send Christian and Gwen to deal with that... might as well go yourself. Sam and I can handle this." Dean didn't really grasp the concept of Samuel's point. He didn't even want Samuel in his house to begin with.

Samuel's eyes glared at Dean. "Once we are finished here I think it's wise for you to come with us." He said and Dean nearly laughed at how ridiculous he sounded. "It's a nice house and you got a good-looking kid there but... we're your blood and we're dying." He sounded almost forceful.

"And how am I supposed to stop that exactly?" Dean asked shaking his head and putting more space between Samuel and him.

"By fighting with us." Samuel smiled. "Come on Dean. You're a hunter, that just doesn't stop because you've had some time off."

"You want me to hunt with you?" Dean still couldn't believe what Samuel was asking. As the two men stared at each other he started to see the seriousness in Samuel's eyes. "No." Dean shook his head. "I can't just leave and abandon my family."

"We are your family." Samuel said quickly and his voice boomed. Dean stared at Samuel and watched as Sam walked into the room. He said nothing. "And we both know you are just going to be putting these people in danger."

"And I can protect them. Hell Clara did just fine earlier."

"Clara?" Samuel laughed. "That's the women you settled with?" he laughed again. "That reckless smart mouth that got my wife and I killed in the first place?" He started to get angry.

"Azazel did that. Clara tried to help." Dean was quick to defend her.

"Oh yea?" Samuel laughed. "Then where was her help when my daughter was making a deal with that demon!" He raised his voice. "Now you really do have to come with us. The further away from that women the better."

"You have no idea what you are talking about so I would suggest you shut the hell up." Dean snapped again. He was furious with Clara but that didn't give Samuel the right to bad mouth his wife. "And get out of my house." Dean ordered. "Sam and I will deal with the Djinn that have been hiding in the back yard for the past hour." Dean turned his back on Samuel.

As Dean stormed back into the kitchen his mind was no longer riddle with questions as to why Clara didn't tell him about Sam. They were replaced with anger toward Samuel and the nerve he had. Dean stood again in the kitchen with his arms crossed.

"That was harsh." Sam sighed as he walked in and looked over at his brother.

"Yeah... I mean the nerve of that guy." Dean rolled his eyes with relief thinking Sam agreed with him.

"I meant you." Sam huffed and Dean narrowed his eyes. "I mean first Clara and now Samuel... When are you going to see that what we are doing is for your own good?" Sam asked shrugging his shoulders.

"What?!" Dean let out an angry laugh and Sam sighed. "You think lying to me and then guilting me back into the life is for my own good?" Dean couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Wow..." Dean rolled his eyes. "Can we just-" Dean started but paused at the sound of the front door opening.

He was half expecting Clara to walk through the door and call out for him. He sighed when he rounded the corner and saw the door right open. "Here." Sam said passing him two syringes loaded with enough Djinn antidote to kill three. Dean gripped both in each hand tightly.

"Come out, come out where ever you are." Dean teased as he Sam made their way through the house.

Sam had split off down one hall while Dean headed upstairs. He checked each room, giving each a quick look. He sighed once he got to the last room. It was their bedroom and the door was open. He sighed again as he stepped in.

"Well hi." A women's voice startled him from behind. The sound of the door slamming behind him made him turn quickly. Dean stood tall and stared at the women. "It's nice to finally meet you Dean." She flashed him a smile. "I mean sure I was hoping to meet you earlier but my brother had the misfortune of finding your wife." The women hissed and she nodded behind Dean.

Dean smirked when he saw the other man behind him. His face a was beaten in and he walked with a bit of a limp. "Ouch." Dean mocked.

"Oh don't worry... We'll get our revenge on that bitch... but first you need to get what's coming to you." She smiled stepping up to him quickly.

Dean took his chance to try to defend himself. He lunged forward with one syringe. She was quick to deflect it and she laughed as she punched him and he flew back to the ground. Dean grunted as he tried to reach for the syringes he had now dropped. "Don't think so." The other laughed and hurried to crush both with one stomp of his foot. Dean sighed as he lightly hit his head on the ground. "Get up!" He yelled and Dean did. He was ready to fight as he slowly reached for the knife tucked in his jeans.

"Oh come on now..." The women laughed and kicked him in the stomach. He stumbled back into the other's grip. "That's no fun." She stomped forward and grabbed his face in her hand. She squeezed tightly and Dean could feel his skin cracking. He struggled from their grip but the Djinn behind him reached around and grabbed his face as well. The burning and cracking got worse. "That's for our father you son of a bitch!"

* * *

Clara had been on the road for hours. Her heart was pounding and her guilt was higher than ever. Sam and Dean wouldn't answer their phones so she slammed on the gas for the last hour of her trip. The sun was long gone by the time she got back to their house. Her car squealed up the street and she barely put it in park before she jumped out.

"Dean!" She called out but stopped when she noticed how quiet it was inside. She slowed her feet and reached or her knife on her belt. She made her way up the stairs slowly and when she finally got to the door it was open. "Damn it." She whispered to herself.

It was the sound of a struggle that made Clara pick up her feet. She jumped into the house and nearly ran into the living room. She watched for a second as Sam tried to fight off two of them. They surrounded him and just smiled at him as he waved his knife in front of them. He was daring them to make a move. His eyes slowly shifted to look at her. She nodded and quickly made her move.

The first of was easy. He hadn't seen it coming. She stuck him in the back and the blue light in his eyes slowly went out as he fell to the floor. Clara was to busy kicking it off her knife to watch the other jump at Sam. It jumped at him and tackled him to the ground. Sam struggled for a bit while Clara ran over and tried kill that one. She swung her arm down holding the knife but was stopped abruptly.

This one saw that coming. He smirked and twisted her wrist. She cried out in pain as she felt the bones in her wrist twist and crackle. She couldn't help fall to her knees in pain and once she was done the Djinn kicked her back. She rolled over herself and hit the wall with enough force to make her exhale. She looked up slowly trying to keep her wrist close. The Djinn continued to punch at Sam's face.

Clara tried to get up, but her whole body was still tense from the earlier attack and now her wrist was most likely broken. She took a long inhale as she closed her eyes and pushed herself up with all she had. She couldn't help the cry of pain because it radiated through her. She wasted no time once she was up. She ran over and kicked the Djinn off Sam. She fell to the ground at the same time because she put all her energy into that kick.

Sam was quick to his feet and even quicker to throw the knife in his hand right through the Djinn. His eyes flared with colour but faded and he dropped to the ground. Clara was nearly curled in a ball when she heard the body fall to the ground. She looked up quickly and saw Sam staring down at the body. He was breathing heavily and she tried her best to push herself up.

"Sam?" Her voice was weak and looked at her quickly. She lifted her good arm up and he grabbed it to help her up. "Dean?" She asked.

"Upstairs." Sam said and they both took off quickly.

Clara was first up the stairs and she was out of breath when she reached the bedroom. She could hear Dean's struggle from inside, but she was too late to stop the attack. His face was turning green and his eyes had started to roll back in his head. Clara froze at the thought he had just died in front of her. Sam had to push her to the side to get to other Djinn. She hit the door frame roughly and her whole body shook with pain.

She watched as Dean fell to the ground and Sam jumped at both Djinn. The women was quick to run for the door and Sam let her. Clara couldn't even be bothered to stop her as she fell to the ground and had to crawl toward Dean's motionless body. "No... No..." She had to keep saying. "You can't die like this." She begged as she finally made it to him. His back was to her but she was able to turn him on his back. "Dean?" She questioned. She placed her good hand on his face and it felt cold. "Hey! No!" She shook him when she couldn't feel him move. "Wake up." She said softly. "Dean!" She nearly screamed.

* * *

_"Dean!" He jumped at the voice. He knew that voice. His eyes opened and he was not where he had fallen. He was in his house, like his childhood house back in Kansas. He looked around quickly and patted himself down. He felt different. He turned quickly and caught his reflection. _

_"What the..." He had to reach for his face. He was so young. No older than 21. He had to smile at his younger self. _

_"Dean!" That voice again called from somewhere in the house. _

_"Yeah?" He questioned not really sure who was calling for him or where they were. _

_"You almost ready?" She giggled and Dean knew exactly who it was. She came around the corner with her hands on her hips and big smile. _

_"Clara?" he had to questioned, she was so young._

_"Expecting someone else?" She asked walking up to him with a smile. "Well don't you look all proper." She said as she reached for his tie and fixed it. "It suits you." She sighed and kissed his cheek lightly. "Now we should get going... if I'm not home by 11 this time my dad is gonna kill me." She smiled taking his hand. "You got the keys right?" She asked as she opened the door._

_"Have fun you two!" Mary met them at the door and Dean felt his heart rip a bit. "Be safe." Mary smiled as she hugged Clara and kissed Dean on the cheek. _

_"Always." Clara flashed his mother a smile. Dean let Clara lead him outside. The sun was gone and before he knew it he was driving. It was like time was skipping. One second they were driving away from the house and next they were driving back. Dean looked around a bit confused. "Hey..." She placed her warm had on his knee and he looked over at her quickly. "You alright? You've been a bit... off tonight." She sighed turning her body a bit to face him. He tried to keep his eyes on the road but her hand was so warm and kept moving up. _

_"I'm fine." Dean answered quickly._

_"Really?" She asked not believing him. "Because that sounds like a lie." She sighed. "Is it your dad again?" She asked. When Dean said nothing she removed her hand and huffed. "Dean we've had this conversation like a hundred times." she sighed as she looked out the window. "You can do whatever you want with your life... you don't have to go along with his master plan." _

_He was a bit thrown off by her tone. It sounded just like all those times she told him he didn't need to be a hunter just because John said so. He had to smile a bit. "I know." He said quietly._

_"Well then what's the problem?" She asked looking over at him. _

_"Nothing." He flashed her a believable smile. _

_"Okay..." She sighed giving up. He reached over and grabbed her hand and she smiled again. "So what do you think? Paris or New York?" She asked with a sigh._

_"For what?" He asked tilting his head a bit still trying to keep his eyes on the road. _

_"I don't know... for anything." She smiled. "To travel, or to live?" She asked and shrugged. "I love Lawrence but it's s small..."_

_"What's wrong with small?" Dean asked as he stopped at a stop sign and looked over at her. It was late an none was around so they weren't in a hurry. _

_"Can't grow in a small bowl." She shrugged._

_"Oh what are you a goldfish now?" Dean mocked her and she laughed slapping him playfully. _

_"Shut up... you know what I mean." She sighed. "Don't you want to get out of here to?" She asked and turned to face him. He still hadn't move the car. _

_Dean stared at Clara and couldn't help but smile. She was so young and hopeful and suddenly it was like his younger self decided to take the conversation from there. He had no control over what he said or did now. He smirked and leaned forward and kissed her lips and she was surprised a bit but gave in quickly._

_"As long as you're with me." He whispered. _

_She giggled and kissed him again. "That was so cheesy." She mocked him a bit as he pulled away and finally started to drive again. _

_"Well duh." Dean rolled his eyes. Clara smiled at him. It was quiet for a second until the sound of a phone vibrating went off from behind them. "What is that?" he questioned. _

_"That would be Daddy." She rolled her eyes and sighed. She looked forward and unlocked her seatbelt and reached behind her to grab her purse. _

_"Wait..." Dean's mind finally started to click. "Clara!" He didn't have time to warn her before the sound of another horn came blaring out of nowhere and the swerve of headlights blinded him. He blacked out for a second but could hear everything. All the metal of the car smashing, the windows shattering and the sound of tires squealing away. _

_"Dean!" A whispering cry woke up. He was really hot. His eyes popped open and he was still in the car. His head on the steering wheel pillowed by the air bag. "Dean..." It came again and Dean sat up not able to feel anything. He knew he was bleeding but he couldn't feel any pain._

_"Clara!" He panicked the moment he noticed she was no longer in the car. It was quiet and Dean started to fight the seatbelt's grip on him and the door that crushed his body. "Clara!" He called out again as he finally got free but fell to the ground. That's when he noticed the car was flipped on its side and why it finally started to hurt when he fell. _

_"Dean..." Her arm was reached out for him as he ran as fast as he could toward her. Her soft grunts, one of her shoes, and the tail of blood, is what he followed to find her. She seemed so far but soon he was huddled over her trying to get her up. _

_"Oh God..." His voice was shaky as he looked her up and down. Both her legs were bent the opposite way, one the bones in her arms was sticking out, and her face was covered in blood. "It's okay..." he tried to sound calm as he noticed how he sat in a pool of her blood. She had to many cuts and lacerations for him to stop himself. "HELP!" He screamed out to anyone who could hear him._

_"Shh..." She lifted her good arm to grab his hand. He knew every move was painful for her but he pulled her close. "So loud." She smiled as she gripped his hand for dear life. _

_"I gotta get you help." Dean said as he was about to move._

_"No..." Her voice cracked and he looked down at her. Her eyes had started to water and she looked terrified. Not by her injuries but by the thought of him leaving. "Please stay." She asked quietly. "I don't wanna be alone." She cried a bit and the tears flowed down her cheeks washing some blood off. _

_"Clara if someone doesn't help-" He couldn't finish._

_"You know in the movies before people are about to die and they look up and say they feel cold?" She asked and Dean nodded._

_"You're not gonna die." He said quickly, his own eyes starting to tear up. "I've got you... You'll be fine." He was reassuring himself more than her. _

_"Sounds so dumb..." She hushed him again. "But I'm cold, really cold." She said trying to hold his hand tighter. She let off a sad laugh._

_"HELP! SOMEBODY!" He cried to no one. _

_"I can't feel my legs..." Her voice was fading. "Dean... Why can't I feel my legs?" She whispered and he thought if he held tighter she would be fine. "Dean..." her voice cracked and she looked right into his eyes. He saw the panic and he couldn't do anything._

_"Just breathe... you'll be okay." he said pushing some of her hair out of her face. It was sticky and bloody but he couldn't help it. She smiled painfully up at him and sighed. "I've got you..."_

_"You've always got me..." She whispered and he smiled through the tears. "Right?" She asked and he nodded quickly but tried not to shake too much. _

_"Yea... Just hold on for me okay?" He asked and she looked down at herself. It was a painful movement and she stopped and gave up. _

_"I don't think I can..." She sighed and gasped a bit at the pain and her tears. "Just don't leave me okay?" She asked, looking up at him with big watery eyes._

_"Okay..." Dean said slowly as he watched her eyes slowly give in. "Clara..." He whispered and she hummed to let him know she was still there. She had become very still after that. He tried to shake her lightly, just to get her eyes to open but soon she was barely breathed. _

_Dean shook his head and bent over placing his forehead on her's. Tears fell onto her face but she didn't flinch at the warmth. He exhaled deeply and kissed her cheek softly, and her grip on his hand loosened. _

_"No..." He shook his head and sat up straight looking down at her broken body. "No Clara come on. Open your eyes. Stop that." His voice cracked. "Clara!" He screamed for her. _


	13. Chapter 12

"DEAN!" Clara screamed as she shook Dean's still body. "Wake up!" She called again.

"Sorry honey... Don't think Dean will be waking up." The Women who had ran earlier stepped back into the room. Sam had stood quickly and tried to attack her. She giggled and just barely touched his arm and he fell the ground convulsing.

"Sam!" Clara screamed with Dean still in her arms uncontentious. "Get up!" She ordered but he was out now.

"The famous Winchesters... taken out by a girl." The Djinn laughed as her eyes flared blue and the ink on her arms started to grow.

Clara glared up at her and nearly growled at her. "Run now before I kill you." Her voice was deep and dark now. She was furious.

"Oh you're not as scary as you think you are." She laughed. Clara shook her head with a smirk and slowly let go of Dean to stand. Once she got to her feet the Djinn laughed harder. "The boys couldn't take me out... what do you got that they don't?" She was curious.

"Rage." Clara said quickly.

"Ouu rage?" She shrugged. "That's good... that makes the best monster." She winked. Clara said nothing as she reached into her jeans and pulled out another knife. "That's cute." She mocked Clara.

"Won't be so cute when it makes you bleed." Clara flashed her a smile as the two women started to circle each other and the room. "So you wanna make your move or should I go first?" Clara smiled.

"I'll go first..." She smiled and wasted no time jumping at Clara. She was quick to move out-of-the-way. Clara shook her head as she reached forehead, grabbing her shirt and pulling her toward herself. Clara had a good hold on her and the knife. She reached back and was about to plunge the knife right into that Djinn's chest when an angry voice stopped her.

"Stop!" He called from the door and they both jumped to look at the two men who stood at the door.

"Samuel?" Clara nearly fainted at the sight of him. He was quick to ignore Clara and stalk forward and grab the Djinn. "What are you doing?" Clara was ignored again. The other man by the door, no younger than Sam or Dean, walked in and pulled a black bag over the Djinn.

"We need her." He was the only one to answer her.

"Why?" Clara asked and Samuel shot her a look.

"That's none of your business." Samuel barked as the other man wrestled the Djinn out of the room.

"Sure as hell is! This is my house." Clara said walking up to him. All those years being dead hadn't changed his annoying presence. Clara could barely deal with Sam being alive, but now the idiot grandfather?

"And I'd be happy to leave it once my grandsons are back on their feet." He huffed at her and pulled out two syringes from his jacket. He handed one to Clara and made sure she had it before letting go. "Go stab him." He rolled his eyes and she backed away.

"What is this stuff?" She asked not moving.

"It's the stuff that is gonna stop Dean from dying... so anytime now." Samuel answered back quickly. "Go inject him." Samuel stepped up to Clara and pushed her shoulder so she would move.

Clara took a deep breath after being pushed. She wanted to punch Samuel in the face for that but she figured the whole saving Dean thing took precedence. She turned and knelt down and without questioning her actions she jabbed the needle into his chest. He jolted at the fluid once she injected him. "Dean?" A smile ran across her face when she saw his chest start to rise and fall. He was breathing, so that was a good sign.

"Ugh... what happened?" Sam's groggy voice came from behind her and she turned her head to watch him get up with the help of Samuel.

"Djinn took you down." Samuel sighed.

"Thought you knew better than to charge at one." Clara smirked up at Sam and he let off a chuckle.

"I'm sure he did what he thought was best." Samuel jumped to defend him for some reason.

"I was joking..." Clara shook her head.

"Is he okay?" Sam walked over to Clara as she knelt next to Dean.

"I don't know... He's breathing..." She pointed out and smiled putting her hand on his chest, feeling it rise and fall.

"We should get him up. He'll need a day to recover then we can move on." Samuel said as he headed for the door.

"Move on?" Clara questioned right away. "Where is he going?" She asked looking over at him with confusion.

"To do his job." Samuel answered and left the room.

"Help me get him up." Sam sighed as he knelt and lifted Dean's shoulders. Clara grabbed one side and they both carried Dean's body toward the bed.

"Down here." Samuel called out. "Bring him to the couch."

"Bed is better!" Clara called back.

"Bring Dean down here!" Samuel ordered. Sam sighed and started to pull Dean toward the door.

"Last time I checked I'm an adult..." Clara said to herself and rolled her eyes.

"Easier if you just go along with it for now." Sam warned her.

"Why... he ain't my grandfather... hell he is barely that to you guys." She added before they made it to the stairs.

"Stop Clara." Sam ordered and Clara stared over at him as they made their way down the stairs slowly. They both had a very heavy and uncontentious Dean balanced in their arms and she was being ordered around by dead people.

When they made it to the end of the steps, Sam bent over and threw Dean over his shoulders. Clara stumbled back at the sudden lifted weight. She sighed as she watched him drop Dean on the couch. "Easy." She warned as she walked over and put a pillow under his head. Dean may be pissed at her but that didn't stop her worry.

She sat on the ground with her back to the arm of the couch for about an hour. She could hear Sam and Samuel talking in the kitchen, and she could hear Dean's rough breaths. She sighed as she took in the small moment of silence.

"I'm sorry..." She whispered as she turned her head to look at him. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you about Sam. I wanted to... so many times but I just-" She paused with a sigh and a tear. "I just couldn't." She shook her head and turned her back again and pressed it against the couch. "It was selfish and I should have told you. But I didn't and I can't take it back. You can hate me forever if you want but I love you no matter what." She sighed. "I need you to know that." She said quietly and got up leaving room.

"Christian and Gwen are transporting the Djinn. They should be back in a few days." Clara over heard Samuel's conversation.

"Who is Christian and Gwen?" Clara asked leaning on the open frame around the kitchen.

"My cousins actually." Sam smirked.

"And they took that Djinn?" She asked and Sam nodded. "Where?" She asked and for a second Sam looked back at Samuel. It was like he had no idea how to answer the question.

"Don't worry about it." Samuel answered.

"I am worried about it. What could you possibly want a live Djinn for? Better off dead." She huffed at him.

"Well this ain't your call girly." He narrowed his eyes and mocked.

"Girly?" She laughed. "Do I look twelve to you?" She asked rolling her eyes. "I want you to leave." She said and Sam looked at her. "Both of you... I want you out of my house."

"Clara..." Sam tried to stop her.

"We aren't going anywhere." Samuel didn't care. "Not until Dean is awake and we can move on."

"He isn't going anywhere with you." She said walking into the kitchen and up to Samuel.

"We are his family and he has responsibilities." Samuel barked back.

"We are his family." She said through her teeth. "He belongs here with us."

"Aren't you getting tired of playing bored house wife?" Samuel mocked. "And I think he is tried of playing mechanic."

"How would you know? You know nothing about Dean or me so I would really like for you to leave before I make you." She said walking out of the room.

"What you gonna go throw flower at me." Samuel laughed looking over at Sam expecting him to laugh as well.

"Not exactly." Her voice carried from around the corner. Sam sighed as he watched her come back with a gun in her hand. "Leave. Now." She ordered putting it right up to Samuel's head. Samuel laughed at Clara and was quick to draw his gun. She didn't even know he had one. "What you gonna shoot me?" She asked and Samuel shrugged.

"Maybe." He said keeping his gun aimed for her head. "Depends if you get in my way."

"And by in your way you mean Dean's way?" She asked.

"Dean's a hunter. Not a house keeper." Samuel shook his head. "He is needed in the field. So he will come with us."

"Don't you think that should be his decision?" Clara asked.

"I already know the answer." Samuel said. "He's pissed. I mean you've been lying to him for years... who do you think he is gonna trust?" Samuel smiled over at Sam. "His brother and grandfather or his lying skank of a wife."

"Hey!" Dean's gruff and gruff voice came from behind them. "That's enough!" He tried to sound intimidating, only he just sounded very hurt.

"You're up." Clara turned her head and smiled at her but he did not smile at her. "Are you alright?" She asked and was ignored again.

"Samuel... gun down now." Dean ordered.

"Her first." Samuel argued.

"What are you five." Clara laughed.

"Clara." Dean barked and she looked back at him. "Put the gun down." He ordered and she stared at him. "Now." He warned.

"Fine." She said through her teeth and lowered it quickly but didn't let it go. She took a deep breath and exhales deeply.

"Samuel." Dean barked when he noticed his gun was still aimed for Clara.

"You know if you died years ago we wouldn't have this problem." Samuel smirked at her.

"Funny I was thinking the same about you." She winked with an angry smirk.

"I said enough." Dean almost yelled. They both looked back to him and watched as he rubbed his face in anger. "Now someone tell me what the hell happened."

"I saved your life that's what happened." Samuel was quick to take the credit.

"Yea.. sure you saved him." Sam rolled his eyes and looked over at Clara with a sorry grin.

"Doesn't matter anymore." Clara shrugged. "Djinn are gone, and it's about time you hit the road." She said looking at Samuel.

"Clara is right." Sam said.

"You're welcome to stay." Clara stopped him. "But he isn't." She smiled at Sam.

"If Samuel goes so do I." Sam shrugged.

"Fair enough." Clara smiled.

"Sam goes I go." Dean spoke up and Clara turned in shock. She never thought he would actually say that.

"You..." She paused. "You want to go with them?" She asked in a low tone trying to hide the hurt. Dean barley looked at her.

"Dean you don't have to." Sam stepped in. "We can handle all this."

"No." Clara shook her head. "He wants to go... then he goes." She shook her head and started to back up. "Fine..." The tears were starting to build up. "I want you all out of my house." She looked down as she passed Dean and nearly ran for the back door. She slammed the door behind her and walked toward the porch steps. She collapsed on the last one and sat on the grass. "Son of a bitch." She cursed at herself and the tears streaming down her face.

Clara sat alone for a minute and when she heard the door open from behind her she quickly wiped her face. She looked down and pretended not to notice someone standing behind her. She took a deep breath and tried to stay still.

"You lied to me." Those words cut deep and hurt more than the beating she got from the first Djinn. "Four years and you never said anything. You said we couldn't keep things from each other because it always got in the way." He huffed. "You made me swear never to lie to you and all you did was lie."He kept talking and she wasn't going to stop him. "You knew Sam was alive! Why didn't you ever tell me!" He started to get angry as he raced down the stairs to look at her. She avoided looking up at him. "Look at me!" He yelled but she didn't. "You could have just told me! It was easy... 'hey your brother is alive'... no big deal!" He said as he just stared at her. She shook her head at his words but said nothing. "You could at least pretend to be sorry!"

"I'm not!" She yelled right back and finally looked at him. Her eyes were burning and red and he was taken back by her voice.

"You're not sorry?" he was confused.

"No." She said. "I didn't tell you Sam was alive because I was protecting you and our family! So I do not regret my actions." She said.

"How could you say that!"

"Like this..." She said standing up. "I'm not sorry! And if I had to do it again I would!" She yelled. "That's how I say that." She rolled her eyes. "It has always been my responsibility to look out for the both of you. Sam was doing just fine and so were we! We were happy! Why couldn't we just stay that way!?" She asked walking up to him with anger. "The only thing I'm sorry for is that you found out the way you did." She shook her head. "I was going to tell you... I just didn't know how."

"All I know is you had four years to tell me." He shook his head.

"And your solution is to run?" She asked. "I kept something from you so you go back to the life we tried so hard to escape from." She shrugged and he looked at her. Just the way he looked at her, hurt. He was so mad and betrayed and she could see it in his eyes. It was like he saw her completely different now and she hated it.

"If you would have told me we could have dealt with it." He said looking down. "But I can't be around someone who lies to me." Clara laughed at that.

"Sam lied too." She shook her head. "And yet you have no trouble riding off into the sunset with him." She shook her head again and stared at him.

"He is my brother."

"And in case you didn't notice I happen to be your wife!" She yelled and held up her hand and grabbed his left hand, making him see both rings. "For better and for worse... do you not remember that part?"

Dean stared at Clara and sighed. He had nothing else to say. He took a step back and started to walk around her. He could hear her little gasp of breath and it broke his heart knowing hers was breaking as he walked away.

"You came to me!" She made one last plea for him to stay. "That night Sam jumped, you came to me. You wanted this and you have it." She said before she turned. "You had no where else to go and I let you in." She finally turned but she was talking to his back. He wouldn't turn. "If I didn't let you in where would you be now?" She asked.

"Probably dead." Dean acknowledged her. He turned his head slightly and looked at her. "I owe you everything but..." He stopped.

Clara's tears fell fast after his last word. She shook her head and looked down. "Just go." She sighed and it broke her heart. Dean looked at her but she had looked down and away from him. She turned her back and covered her face with her hands. She needed to stop the tears before she could go back inside.

Clara stood in the back yard for a minute and when she stopped the tears she expected to turn around and see Dean waiting for her, but sh didn't. She shook her head at the sound of tires pulling out of the drive. She took a deep breath and walked in.

The house was dark and quiet when she walked in. She locked the back door behind her as she walked into the kitchen and turned the light back on. She huffed when she saw a note on the table.

"_Never meant for it to go down this way... I'm sorry.- Sam."_

She rolled her eyes at the note and crumpled it in her hands. She couldn't believe she stood alone in the house. She wanted to call Bobby and check up on Adrian and Gwen but she was so tired. She saw the shattered glass and bloody mantle from the attack earlier and knew she had to clean that before she brought Gwen home.

Clara sighed s she walked into the kitchen and reached under the sink. She fished out a pail and some bleach. She sighed as she added some water and pulled gloves over her hands. She made her way back to the living room and started her clean up.

She swept up the glass then brought out the vacuum. She sighed as she heard all the little shards being sucked up. She shook her head as she finished and looked around making sure nothing was out of place. It looked clean but she still felt something was missing. She knew it was the table but it was more than that.

"He made his choice." She told herself at least a hundred times that night. She sat in the living room, unable to go to her room. She pulled her knees up to her chest as she pulled out her phone.

"It's about time you called." Bobby barked as soon as he answered.

"I'm sorry I had some stuff to take care of." She sighed. "Are they alright?" She asked quickly.

"Been up stairs all night. Gwen tried to stay awake until you called but you know her..." He chuckled a bit. "Adrian hasn't left her side, so they're safe." Bobby sighed. "What about you?" He asked.

"Djinn are taken care of and the boys are on the road again..." She sighed and Bobby was silent. "Just like old times."

"He left with Sam?" Bobby couldn't believe it and Clara could tell by his tone. "What is he insane? Did he get hit in the head?" he had to laugh at the dumb decision.

"No..." She sighed. "He couldn't get over the fact I lied to him. So he left." She shrugged and tried not to look up at her mantel. The photos staring at her like memories from another life. She started to laugh once she saw the one of the three of them on the hood of the Impala when they were teenagers. "I really thought we could be normal."

"You were for a while." Bobby heard her crushed tone.

"And I was stupid to think that I could keep it that way." She laughed again. "I should have just told him."

"You thought you were doing the right thing."

"I always what I think is best and every god damn time it blows up in my face!" She started to get angry. "I'm just so tired of failing Bobby..." The tears and broken voice made her feel so weak.


	14. Chapter 13

PLEASE READ:

Hello my lovely readers! This is a short chapters to just cover the jump I am going to make! I hope everyone is okay with me fast forwarding because this whole drawn out thing is hard to write! So After this I'm getting Clara back in the game to get her man back ;)

PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW WHAT YOU THINK SO FAR! I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR YOUR IDEAS, THEORIES, OR EVEN CONCERNS! A WRITER CAN'T MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY OF THE PEOPLE DON'T WRITE ME! :) I appreciate everyone for reading and keeping loyal to the story! My biggest thanks and love goes to you!

Anyways here is that short chapter...

* * *

"I'm sorry I don't think I quite understand." Penelope's panicked voice rang through the house as she paced in front of the couch. Clara watched as she walked back and forth while Derek sat next to her staring at her.

"What's there to question? He left." Clara sighed.

"When!" Penelope yelled.

"About two weeks..." Clara sighed. "And keep your voice down. Gwen and Adrian are up stairs." Clara sighed. She wanted to keep this to herself but when they popped by unannounced and asked where Dean was and where she had been for the last two weeks she needed to tell them.

"Why did he leave?" Derek was oddly calm during this conversation.

Clara looked over at him and sighed. "Sam is alive. Has been for four years almost and I didn't tell him." The room fell silent. She looked between both friends as they stared blankly at her. "Yeah..." She sighed at the shock in their faces.

"Holy shit..." Penelope and Derek exhaled.

"Is that a regular occurrence in your life?" Derek seemed a bit confused. Clara looked over at him a bit confused as well. "People coming back from the dead?" He asked and sighed.

"Sometimes..."

"How long did you know?" Penelope asked trying to find a way to help her take some guilt off her shoulders.

"The whole time."

"The _whole_ time?" Penelope stared at her wide eyes.

"You can't seriously be mad too..." She said looking at her feeling betrayed by her friends. They both stared at her. "Oh come on. You realize I had to keep it to myself. He would have run off and right back into the life he wanted out of. I helped him to get out..."

"You didn't tell him his brother was alive." Derek added. "You really can't see your mistake there?"

"Gwen needed her father..." Clara sat up straight. "Not a lie or a story I made up." She said trying to get them on her side.

"What makes you think he would have left?" Penelope looked over at her and tilted her head.

"Please. That's what the Winchester's are good at." Clara rolled her eyes. "The moment he found out he would have been out the door like that..." She snapped her fingers. "It would have given him an easy way out of the situation." She huffed. "And look I was right... He left when he found out." She threw her arms up and got up.

Penelope sat next to Derek and reached or his hand. He grabbed on tightly and they both sighed as they looked at each other. They then watched Clara walk into the kitchen and pour herself another glass of wine. Her and Penelope had shared the bottle but she took the last of it. They both sighed again when they watched her take a big gulp and half the glass was gone.

"Clara..." Penelope started as she walked back into the living room and stood in front of the couple.

"No." She shook her head. "You are gonna do that thing where you try to make me see it his way... NO. You're supposed to be on my side." Clara was now mad at them. "He left us and you are on his side?" She couldn't believe it. "Hell I can't believe you are in Dean's side... I mean you hated him." She looked at Derek.

"I didn't hate him." Derek said quietly.

"You called him an abusive dead beat." Clara reminded him and Derek sighed. "Turns out you were right."

"No I wasn't." Derek looked up at her with his eyes narrowed. He knew he shouldn't be defending the guy who hurt Clara but she was so blind to her mistake it frustrated him. "He had a choice a long time ago, to leave and he stayed. He helped you raise that little girl and was here even when things got rocky. Many guys would have quit but he didn't." Derek said shaking his head.

"He did." Clara was just being stubborn now.

Both Penelope and Derek sighed. "You didn't give him much choice." Derek shook his head.

"Not for a second do I believe that Dean would ever leave if he thought he could stay." Penelope sighed. "I mean come on..." She sighed. "He's been in love with you since he was eighteen... you don't just let that go." She shrugged. "Like Derek said you didn't leave him much choice."

"Seriously..." Clara sighed looking at her friends. It was quiet for a long time and Clara just looked at the ground.

"You should probably call him..." Derek spoke up. "Tell him he can come home and you both can move on."

"No." Clara shook her head and looked up at them.

"Clara..." Penelope sighed.

"No, I at least get to be mad for a few more days." Clara sighed knowing how stubborn she was being.

"Fine... just don't take too long." Penelope sighed.


End file.
